Help! Random Discharge from the Suboxone Program

[TigerFan]

Are you serious?! You're so afraid of withdrawals that you want to go on METHADONE to help get off of 2 MGS of bupe. That's like having a lobotomy to help with a headache. Yeah, the situation sucks but it's time to man up. I'm in the same boat as you are by the way so I know what you're going through.

There was a certain opiophile here (not here now) that I basically watched descend into hell going from suboxone to methadone to benzos to crack. All in the name of avoiding pain. The guy's life seemed to be a disaster last I heard. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and face the pain. Good luck.

[mac]

Thanks for all the advice everyone, I really appreciate it. I got really lucky today as I got into a Suboxone office about an hour and a half south of where I live. The clinic's patient limit was full but the doctor was kind enough to take me in and give me bupe samples until a slot opens up in two weeks. Also, it turns out my original doctor really couldn't have written my script today as his garage door apparently came down on his head. He is currently in the intensive care unit and my new doc said he'd probably be forced into early retirement. I'm not sure of the extent of his injuries, if he's brain damaged, paralyzed, or what but it's a horrible thing to have happen. I hope he and his family make it through this okay. He helped a lot of people out of a bad place over the years.

Tigerfan: I was already considering switching to methadone before my discharge from my original doctor's office. I wasn't getting on it to kick subs, I would've been getting on it for long term maintenance. I am, however, going to stick with bupe for a while longer and see how things go.

pain patient: Thanks for the advice. You're absolutely right that I need to find something to fill the gap left that opiate use used to fill. This situation kind of jump-started me into getting things moving. I'm going to start exercising and looking for a job. Being active might even help with the side effects that make suboxone treatment less-than-pleasant for me.

dharma bum: You're right that going from 16mg to 2mg is a hell of a lot easier than going from 2mg to nothing. I would've never made it through. I got really fucking lucky finding this doctor and I really like him. He seems like someone who really cares and is very involved in helping his patients. Thanks for your input as well. And I love your avatar! Tool is one of my favorites.

[modega]

Originally Posted by mac

Thanks for all the advice everyone, I really appreciate it. I got really lucky today as I got into a Suboxone office about an hour and a half south of where I live. The clinic's patient limit was full but the doctor was kind enough to take me in and give me bupe samples until a slot opens up in two weeks. Also, it turns out my original doctor really couldn't have written my script today as his garage door apparently came down on his head. He is currently in the intensive care unit and my new doc said he'd probably be forced into early retirement. I'm not sure of the extent of his injuries, if he's brain damaged, paralyzed, or what but it's a horrible thing to have happen. I hope he and his family make it through this okay. He helped a lot of people out of a bad place over the years.

I am a bit late, and I am glad to here you found a doctor. I was going to mention the option of telepsychiatry. I see my doctor over a webcam every two months. A lot of psychiatrists are starting to see people over webcams nowadays, and I was lucky enough to find one halfway across the United States.

It is cheap, 80/month, and I get a refill. It is 165 a visit, which breaks to 80 a month. He is tapering me on benzos and I used to taper on the suboxone. I got 60 8mg a month. I am off of the suboxone now, have been for a while, and now I am tapering on my klonopin. He is great, and isn't rushing me, and let me take my time and do it at my own pace.

If you ever want to, google telepsychiatry, you may be able to find a good doctor. Good luck with your future ventures, and I hope you do well on maintenance.

Good luck my opiobro.

[doctor diesel]

Originally Posted by Oakleyskier

dont you love a bad kick, you gotta shit your brains out, so you sit on that freezing cold toilet seat, while sweating your ass off, the seat sends that chill up your back, you have projectiles coming from your anus, and than you take a breath and gag, only to find yourself shitting, and puking at the same time while rocking back and forth. your too sick to clean it up, so you throw a towel over the yellow gooey puke, clean your ass to the best of your ability, than pull your trousers up to have your soaking wet boxers that are now cold, on your hot sweaty balls, ugggh , his comment on vomiting for a month just made me relive those awful moments.

Hey Oakley, it could be much, much worse...
You could end up shitting out of your mouth like Jacky did in that famous thread, remember?




Doc

[GOLD N DIEMONDS]

Originally Posted by doctor diesel

Hey Oakley, it could be much, much worse...
You could end up shitting out of your mouth like Jacky did in that famous thread, remember?




Doc

OH YEAH WE REMEMBER
A very Brave man to share his mishaps to benefit other!

http://forum.opiophile.org/showthread.php?t=200

[Seedy]

Hey Mac, just skimmed through this thread, glad you managed to get back on the subs, that's sure fucked up what happened to your old doc, poor guy, and you're right, there's bound to be a bunch of other patients in a similar or worse situation to you.

i'm glad you didn't have to do a ct off subs, i think people underestimate it, 2mgs may seem like a small dose but i think coming off any amount of subs if you've been on them long term is a pretty hellish kick by all accounts. it amazes me how different the system is in the US than here in New Zealand. over there it seems that money talks, if you have the means ($$, a car and the time) you can get on subs without a problem. and when you do you have it pretty sweet - monthly visits, massive doses, benzos, even i've noticed to get you started or for coming off.

when i got to the point where i needed maintenance (had a good job, a kick or even a taper was out of the question), the only option was the public health system, could have possibly got on codiene through my gp but that wouldn't have cut it and they most probably would have referred me to the PHS. i had a friend in a different city (tui) who had got on subs at that point so i knew it was an option, however the clinic only told me, after a month of fucking around that the only option was a 10 day taper.

this turned into a 6 day taper (after a couple more weeks of fucking around), before i got on i was at my wick's end, broke and strung out, already hating the system. the 6 days of subs were amazing (by then i'd got my tollerance down so the switch was easy). their "taper" was 3 days on 4mg, 3 on 2mg, dosing in front of them at the clinic daily, fucking useless, i thought i'd be able to get down to like .5mg, but no "the pills don't get any lower than 2mg, and it's illegal for us to halve them, anyway, they'd just dissolve on contact with air over night" fucking bullshit.

so needless to say, 3 days after my "taper" i was in pure hell, no benzos, had to work, so back on to the poppy seeds. after another month or so they eventually admitted that i could get on suboxone (after trying to get me on 'done, saying that it's probably do just as well and dismissing all the horror stories i told them i'd heard about mmt). after another couple of months of fucking around, i was a week away from getting on subs, i found out that i'd have to dose at the clinic until i got stabilised, and then daily at the pharmacy. and although i told them straight up that after my 6 day taper i was certain that 4mg/day would be plenty, they told me i needed a bigger dose. i eventually convinced them that a) i couldn't afford it, and b) i'd already fucking been on subs for 6 days and knew for sure that 4mg covered up all my withdrawals and that would be plenty!

by this time i was beyond disgruntled, the reason i wanted on subs over methadone (other than the obvious, that 'done would be overkill, replacing my little monkey with a gorilla) was that i wouldn't have to pick up my dose every day. but no, not in this nanny state, can't let someone dispense their own meds! but i toughed it out and have now been on 4mg/day for a year. i now dose 8mg every 2 days at the pharmacy and have to give at least 2 weeks notice every time i want to go anywhere. i've told them a few times that i could easily drop my dose (you'd think this would be a good thing, right?), but no, i have to cut down my drinking & other drugs before that happens. they test me every few months, thc is ok but they're starting to hassle me about that now. amphetamines and benzos are a no no. i can generally get around it, having warning when my appointments are, but damn, i just have to stop being so honest (start lieing even more that it) so they'll cut me some slack. they won't consider even dropping my dose, let alone tapering off until i get my other shit in check. for fuck's sake, i went in because of an opiate problem, i like taking drugs and can't see myself even considering stopping any time soon.

and if i ever do get to the point where i can taper off it's all on the clinic's terms, absolutely no chance of benzos, hell, it's even an ordeal to get fucking zopiclone (shit is practically useless anyway). during my last 'taper' the most they'd prescribe at once was 5 pills, i ended up taking 4 of them on the first night full on withdrawals (1 the previous night) just to knock myself out so i'd have a minimum amount of sanity for the high stress job i was doing at the time.

right now i'm thinking about just saying fuck it and getting off the shit, i could maintain on seeds at a similar price without having to jump through the hoops, at least over summer, and then i'd have the freedom to travel a bit without having to know exactly where i'd be all the time. but then if and when i came to the point where i needed the stability of subs again i'd have the whole rigmarole of playing the game again (if they even let me back on.

sorry about the novel but i just wanted to point out that you've got it easy over in the US in some ways, the choice of clinics, the freedom of monthly prescriptions, the ability to buy off the streets when in a pinch.

[mac]

@modega: Thanks for the information, even if it is a bit late, and I'm glad to hear that you've made it off the subs. I've never even heard of what you describe before, seeing a doc over the internet. How does it work with urine tests and everything? Also, how do you get your prescriptions, are they mailed to you?

@Seedy: Thanks for sharing your experience. It is a bitch kicking subs after being on them so long and i wasn't ready to detox just yet. Maybe someday, but right now I'm just not in a position, mentally and emotionally, to do it; I'd use again at the next opportunity.

Your situation down in New Zealand sounds fucked up. Perhaps we do have it good here, being able to get monthly privileges and all, but there are many junkies in the 'States that don't have the money or means to get on suboxone maintenance. It's quite apparent that changes need to be made so that more people can have easy, convenient, affordable access to treatment. After all, if they don't want us to use drugs they should at least provide us with a means to get off them.

[Seedy]

^^ yeah, very true, if i ever reach rock bottom here there's always done, you just need a bit of patience and willpower to jump through the hoops and it's free.