Evil?

[alowishus]

I saw a thread just now asking if the poster was evil - & it got me thinking of some of the things I've done. The pain in it, the fun in it, the death in it - and then no longer any fun in it.
I'm not one of those people that need to play w/ dead things, their afraid of the living, lonely souls they are; no I need mine much alive or the terror and the torment losses all it's meaning. Limb bones break quite easy, easier then you'd think, it just takes a little tension and a hard point. Once the blood has been seen then the ends are limitless.

Did you know you can make candy outta blood.

It's not about the pain of course, it's about the pleasure - mine - things never ever mean to get so far along, but.....there are those times....

Evil - that thread got me to think; most people wouldn't know evil if it looked 'em right in the eyes and shoved a fish hook through their those eyes.

No one ever stops to think, they just keep asking why, why, why........we all die with out the answers.

[Badly Drawn Girl]

WTF???????????

[RobotJones]

is this a confessional?

[Chuck]

which post? the one about the guy going to church to pick up chicks?

CHUCK

[rockbottom]

I saw a thread just now asking if the poster was evil - & it got me thinking of some of the things I've done. The pain in it, the fun in it, the death in it - and then no longer any fun in it.
I'm not one of those people that need to play w/ dead things, their afraid of the living, lonely souls they are; no I need mine much alive or the terror and the torment losses all it's meaning. Limb bones break quite easy, easier then you'd think, it just takes a little tension and a hard point. Once the blood has been seen then the ends are limitless.

Did you know you can make candy outta blood.

It's not about the pain of course, it's about the pleasure - mine - things never ever mean to get so far along, but.....there are those times....

Evil - that thread got me to think; most people wouldn't know evil if it looked 'em right in the eyes and shoved a fish hook through their those eyes.

No one ever stops to think, they just keep asking why, why, why........we all die with out the answers.

but now i know how evil thinks---good thing i go armed -felon or not

[barbiegal]

Um, You ok Alow?:confused:

[frankie]

I am sorry but i just don't get it

[Papa Verine]

I have to say that I would know evil if it stared me in the face. I used to be good friends with a guy who I determined over time to be an evil sociopath. When somebody asks me "Do you think I'm bad?" or "Do you think I'm evil?" I compare them to this old buddy of mine and I haven't had to say "YES" once yet.

This guy was likable too. I enjoyed hanging out with him A lot. We had A lot of laughs and shit... partied A lot... But when he was pissed off at his ex girlfriend he stole her dog from the yard and cut the dog's head off and left it on her porch. When he'd do coke he'd get real horny and call hookers then rape and beat them. Shit like that... I'm leaving out the worst of it, believe me...

At first I didn't know he was so evil. I don't knowingly befriend rapists and sickos like this guy. I learned and I decided to just kinda back away slowly. you know, I didn't want to offend him or who knows what would've happened to my cats, or mom... So I just distanced myself and he eventually got incarcerated for a long time.

But... this guy really was evil. His mother was evil to him his entire life and he turned out much like her. She offered me 5K to kill her husband but my buddy said "No" because he wanted 10K at least and was pissed off because she tried to go around him and his bid and get me to do it for less. I kinda got into the middle of a family dispute there... She had previous husbands as well... I don't know what happened to them.

Of course this is all just a dream I had. None of it's true. But I *do* think I know evil.

[losangeleslifer]

Left field is now empty.

[Kristy85]

Come on, spill? Who you done in???

[kellyblue]

Come on, spill? Who you done in???

The last person that asked me that question...

And yes- I've seen Evil, and hope to never go there again.

Al- you ok buddy?

[dharma bum]

How good is this candy cause these damn subs make me crave it like never before?

Seriously man, that sounded like Ted Bundy's diary or blog.

I hope your rehabillitated......and whether that's a lame joke or not depends on whether or not this is fiction or....something else.

[Suboxstitute]

ALOW - Are you writing a HLITL-type novel? Hope it's fiction.

Sue

[ZodiacKiller]

Geez, Alow---are you ok, my friend? Gimme a buzz if ya wanna talk or something. Now even I'm getting a little worried about you.


ZK

[Narkotikon]

To me, true evil is more akin to how a sociopath would be. Lack of emotion, empathy, and care of how their actions / deeds affect others. Once a person looses that moral / ethical filter, anything is fair game. I believe most sociopaths are born that way. I think their brains are lacking whatever it is that functions as an emotional center. I do think that some people can learn sociopathic behavior though, from trauma or whatever, but I don't think they're true sociopaths. I think they have sociopathic tendencies.

............................

Alow: Are you okay? I hope you're not upset. I really did think you were meaning something else in those messages. Sorry for the misunderstanding. I apologize. I thought you were thinking I was whining because of how you wrote that "myspace" thread. I thought you were saying I should shut the fuck up. I know now that's not what you meant, so I'm sorry.

[Poppylvr]

I saw a thread just now asking if the poster was evil - & it got me thinking of some of the things I've done. The pain in it, the fun in it, the death in it - and then no longer any fun in it.
I'm not one of those people that need to play w/ dead things, their afraid of the living, lonely souls they are; no I need mine much alive or the terror and the torment losses all it's meaning. Limb bones break quite easy, easier then you'd think, it just takes a little tension and a hard point. Once the blood has been seen then the ends are limitless.

Did you know you can make candy outta blood.

It's not about the pain of course, it's about the pleasure - mine - things never ever mean to get so far along, but.....there are those times....

Evil - that thread got me to think; most people wouldn't know evil if it looked 'em right in the eyes and shoved a fish hook through their those eyes.

No one ever stops to think, they just keep asking why, why, why........we all die with out the answers.

Um, alowishus, I can be kinda thick & slow on picking up stuff.
But this is a disturbing post.
I don't mind being the geeky girl that doesn't get it - and I don't get your post.
I hope all is well with you, my fellow opiophile. Am curious to hear from you again.
Granny Poppylvr

[Suboxstitute]

Um, alowishus, I can be kinda thick & slow on picking up stuff.
But this is a disturbing post.
I don't mind being the geeky girl that doesn't get it - and I don't get your post.
I hope all is well with you, my fellow opiophile. Am curious to hear from you again.
Granny Poppylvr

Yeah fill us in a little more; what about my minor attempt at humor (the HLITL novel) in an earlier post...not that I didn't enoy those little stories ('cuz truth be told I did) I did but I thought (hoped) those were imaginings and not 4 real.

you sounded serious, Where'd you go?

[ndoftaworld]

Unfortunately, I'd have to agree with Al

When the blood really starts gushing... the smell of it... GOD! Like power incarnate!! The true BEING of one - hitting the walls, ceiling, and furniture like a water balloon fight... only more colorful

Bathtubs are imminently more practical though, saving all the rich, coppery-flav... uh, smelling blood from escaping... After-all cleanup IS HALF THE FUN!!

The body parts always got to me tho... had a group with special talents on call to do THAT dirty work... I don't like details, don't gettem. Plus, a bigger discount each time

I do like to keep a 'collection' though... it's not a real conversation starter u might say... so I'll leave the details out, hehe.

Sleep tight fellow ophiles, and think warm thoughts.

Nd

[Narkotikon]

This is turning into a Hannah-esque cutter thread. Let's all slash our arms and wrists and post pics. Let's make a contest out of it. I bet I can do it better!

[ndoftaworld]

This is turning into a Hannah-esque cutter thread. Let's all slash our arms and wrists and post pics. Let's make a contest out of it. I bet I can do it better!

But, the arms are so... BORING.

Can't we vote (or choose ourselves??!??) what to mutilate for the world, it SHOULD be our right.

Otherwise... I'm GAME!!

Nd

[Narkotikon]

Sure. I'm partial to arms though. I think it's more dramatic. It puts it right out there for all to see. I'd say the next best would be your neck, but that's tricky. Don't want to go too deeply, lest you hit the jugular, or do you?

And no, I'm not a cutter. I'm just being sarcastic. I did used to scratch when I was younger, but that stopped when I got on opiates. I know why cutters do it though: when your body is damaged, it releases endorphins and enkephalins. What are opiates? Exogenous endorphins. When people cut themselves, they get a temporary flood of endorphins, and (depending on how severely they've cut themselves) they get a flood of pleasure. It calms them down. One treatment is to give Naltrexone (Revia) to cutters, because it blocks those endorphins, thereby supposedly stopping the reinforcing behavior. Personally, I think that's cruel. They're obviously cutting themselves for the pleasure, because they can't feel any otherwise. I think giving an antagonist would just make them feel even number. A second, more controversial, option is to prescribe opiates. The doctor at the methadone clinic I was at said he knew of a doctor in NYC who treated cutters by prescribing Vicodin. He told them to take a pill each time they had the urge to cut. Not sure how "legal" that is, but I can see it working, although I'm not sure if I'd want an addiction on top of the cutting. I will say that I don't like it when people brag about it though, like Hannah did. I think it's a juvenile cry for help.

[ndoftaworld]

All extra-torturous acts aside... I used to b a cutter. There is NOTHING like the rush, which I think is why many ppl try and (ahem.) like needles.

Just an opinion tho...

Nd

[Narkotikon]

All extra-torturous acts aside... I used to b a cutter. There is NOTHING like the rush, which I think is why many ppl try and (ahem.) like needles.

Just an opinion tho...

Nd

Eh, it was a definite rush, very similar to opiates, but it wasn't that great IMO. I didn't do it very often though. And I never really bragged about it. It was something I was ashamed of. I don't get people like Hannah who brag about it. If I had to place it on a scale of 1-10, I'd say it was about a 5. Opiates would be a 10.

I can see the needle fetish people get being partly caused by that, if you're / were a cutter that is. I've IV'd before, but never got a needle fetish or anything. To be honest, I thought it was kind of a hastle. Having to worry about getting clean needles, and I have really small veins anyway, like a girl, so it was just a bitch.

[RobotJones]

i had a needle fixation for quite a while. i was shooting my cherry flavored liquid methadone every day for a LONG time. which is pointless cuz you dont get a rush, just the tease of one, and the oral bio-availability of methadone is like 98% or something so it's not like dope, where you get more of a rush when you IV it. i eventually tapered off the 'done, but i was still shooting water and dormin every day just to get the needle fix in. i don't feel the need to do it anymore, unless of course there's a big shot of H in the syringe. (or coke once a year).

[robojunkie]

People don't recognize "evil" because evil is simply the lack of good not some force in and of itself. Evil is as evil does, think about all the evil deeds in human history, nearly all done in the name of good or god or country or race or some other nefarious hifalutin' notion.

[ndoftaworld]

*Grumble* I STILL think my lil girl is EVIL - not described as, but in actual form of - with her bday. C'mon, I know MOST dad's don't hope for their daughter to be born on the calendar's reference to the evil one hehe, but then again... most dad's aren't born on HALLOWEEN, are they?

06/06/06 - The world met Raven Lea. Too bad for the world, huh? :cool:

Nd

[I-Nod]

Now that's putting the 'edge' back in Ophile and honing it with a block of shear shock-value!! :eek:

Sooo... following in the footsteps of harm-reduction, I have to ask that you wear gloves Alow. It may prevent the spread of HepC or HIV when coming in contact with blood, or at the very least, help shield your hands from getting cut up in the event a bone that's breaking becomes a compound fracture.

[pizzaboy]

Ummmm...did I miss something? Everyone ok??

[losangeleslifer]

Thar be monsters here!!:eek:

[InfectedMushroom]

I'm a little worried about you man, I hope everything's ok...