being a JUNKY

[Chicago]

SO on the honest side of the junk side,
It is hard being a junky, & I no if I never had tricks up my sleeve or HELP, I would not have computer or internet.

I.E. I had a great cpu 5g back in '01 pawned/loan on it back in '03 never got it back for the amount of $150.
I rather have junk then the net?

So how many do get help w/this stuff , honestly!!!!!

[OxyContinuously]

you are quite right bro

sometimes it gets really hard living the life we live and doing the things we do...

i always focus on tomorrow b/c even if today was shitty,, we know we always have tomorrow to build on our fuck-ups and stuff like that and make it a better day than today..

i have lost a lot of things b/c of dope whether it be jewelry, tv's, computers, cameras, fender guitars, girls, you name it, and i have probably lost it at one time or another..

only things i have managed to hang on to are my integrity and my dignity...sometimes it's really good, other times not so good

but there have been more good days than bad, and i guess that's what matters in the grand scheme of things.

later bro
t

[rockbottom]

always had to deal to support my habit-never a good thief- although a few good scams did come my way:cool:

[nick]

Yeah,free dope.Without it.................I'd rather not think about it.

[jdub]

Fuck, I dealt through most of my habit. Job pays more now, just have to wake up and work.Nice not worrying too much about LE, but I miss the grind.

Shit ain't easy and it ain't no joke. Compounding that fact is that no one understands how important these substances are to us.

[Chicago]

"GRINDEN" is a lifestle & is real hard to get outta of it when you become a so use to it!!!

Does it pay off, sometimes, but we all no it's called grinden b/c we just getten buy, it all evens out at the end, u may have a 10g lick & nothen for a few months.

"Just Grinden to get by!!!

Fuck, I dealt through most of my habit. Job pays more now, just have to wake up and work.Nice not worrying too much about LE, but I miss the grind.

Shit ain't easy and it ain't no joke. Compounding that fact is that no one understands how important these substances are to us.

[drugsaregood]

I know what you're talking about bro. I'm looking to get some help now and am working on a plan to do so. Have some good ideas.

I've gotten rid of acouple of items I figured I could do without. PDA, etc. I wish I had some of that crap every now and then but it's not the end of the world really...Just sucks to think how easy it is to convert all of your $\possesions into shit that lasts less than 24 hours in your body, and it becomes a distant faded memory thats mixed in with the hundreds of other times you've gotten high.

I still have a lot of nice shit. PS3, tv, etc. I'd rather sell my left nut than my PS3. Without my valuables I'd be bored as fuck, probably be out committing crimes to get high. It's good to have shit to entertain you when your sick too. Takes your mind off of shit and distracts you..

[rockbottom]

when i grow up i want to own a pawnshop--lost my Fender Strat and Gibson/Les paul studio recording bass along with most everything else during hard times when i needed shit--the only things that kept their value was the guns i hawked, always got at least what i paid for them and sometimes more. lost on everything else-gold, cars,guitars electronic equipt. i guess guns were my best investment. amazing country we have here.:cool:

[Ron-Doe]

true dat, sks cost me $160, got $350 in dope for it.

[Somanax]

when i grow up i want to own a pawnshop--lost my Fender Strat and Gibson/Les paul studio recording bass along with most everything else during hard times when i needed shit--the only things that kept their value was the guns i hawked, always got at least what i paid for them and sometimes more. lost on everything else-gold, cars,guitars electronic equipt. i guess guns were my best investment. amazing country we have here.:cool:

No doubt bro

the unregistered not "hot"

All the better

Love everything you don't wanna be in front of

I guess I'm a gunfreak

Then again maybe I ain't a freak

Least not that away.......Check the avatar :cool:

[jonny-5]

my brother gave me a PSP for my bday and everyday i think about pawning/selling it but i love it too much. thats what i said about my ibanez gsr200 bass guitar tho and thats long gone....

[Raz]

Always try and keep some safety net of money in the bank....And put it back if i have to take some out!

I truly am a spender, coz i earn it my way, but without my missus as my financial adviser,i would either be a multi millionaire or doing 25yrs....

But together we make it work....And we tick over without any debts!!(touchin wood)

On my own it would be a whole nother deal.....A fuckin raw deal,proberly not very pretty.Probably a disaster....

..But as it is,i'm maintaining a family home coz i love my kid before myself or any drug...And keepin a happy home is real important deal for me...So i have no choice, but to hold it together .....

[Poppylvr]

SO on the honest side of the junk side,
It is hard being a junky, & I no if I never had tricks up my sleeve or HELP, I would not have computer or internet.

I.E. I had a great cpu 5g back in '01 pawned/loan on it back in '03 never got it back for the amount of $150.
I rather have junk then the net?

So how many do get help w/this stuff , honestly!!!!!

When I was still using good drugs (on Sub now), I was stealing drugs from the hospital where I worked. I perfected a slick scheme (yeah, it was SO SLICK I got a 2cd degree felony out of it - but hey it worked for awhile!) whereby I could get my grubby paws on mor-FEEN without depriving the patient of needed drug. It was very important to me that my need for drugs did not mess with my patient's need for drugs, so even while I was stealing I still had at least one moral concern.
After I was arrested, I lost my house b/c I couldn't get a job at my former salary rate. Check this out, tho - friends of mine bought my house & rented it back to me at a slum rate, so my kids & I didn't have to move. How cool is that?

[ZodiacKiller]

One thing I swore I would never do is sell either A) any guitars, amps, or music gear B) any computer gear, or C) my wife's engagement ring for drugs.

So far I have kept my promise and intend to. Sure, every paycheck is spent before I get it, but we have a place to live, provide food for ourselves & animals, have running vehicles, and cable TV /high-speed internet.

I do this by dragging my ass out of bed and going to work. Until I win the lottery (which should happen any day now---I AM destined to live a life of leisure), I will continue doing this.....



ZK

[tasteuvheaven]

I have lost alot of things in these past few years. 2 cars, jewelry (which I wouldn't have pawned or sold, but ex was sick and I couldn't bare to see him so sick) Stereos, televisions, just about everything you could possibly think of. One thing I am glad I can say is I never lost my kids, and have straightened myself out enough to where I will NEVER lose them. I am glad to say that no matter what has happened or how sick I was, I have never taken from them, and they have always been first. There has been times where I was so sick all I have done was cry...but I managed to pull myself out of bed and treat my children like gold all day. I wish I had everything I have lost now, but I guess I can't dwell.

[Chicago]

@somanax who is no freak Re: the guns, I feel the same way. But I feel if I was able to ever pawn one of mine at 1 point i woulda.

@zk I no so many people that there pride posc was there guiter/amps & all the shit that goes w/that. Swore this shit I will never part with. But he did get to a point afters 2-3yrs where he did 1rst a loan then aanother then never paying back.

I never was into guiters but in one point or another have gotten rid of alot or mostly evrything that had value in the past, some people have more items some have less, b/c some of us(me) when did run into cash instead of treating them selves to a ps3 or something just went str8 to the dope man.

Ck this & this is no lie & never like to bullshit,
Back in '01-03 me & my ex was liven in a hotel & it was a suite not a shitty motel the lady upfront was given me discount rates of $60buks a night,anyways my lady was a stripper a really high class strip clubs in the downtown Chicago area, b/c in that area there's all the conventions, movie stars & all the sports stars that come in, so she was making REAL GOOD CASH MONEY DAILY, MIN $500 A NIGHT & WORKED 7 DAYS A WEEK & I WAS GRINDEN FOR LICKS DAILY.
So to sum this up, we counted that one year we spent over 74k to one specific dealer on heroin. We bought 21-30bags a dayor more.

When i did not have any money or lets ssay when i got on mmt or or was quitting did ya ever notice you NEVER HAVE THE SAME AMOUNT OF MONEY, LIKE YOU DID WHEN U WERE USING DOC...

[red26]

I used to be a thief. No long jobs just short game. Grifting just aint my bag so I tried to stay away from it best I could but in a pinch... used to make a few hundred a day I guess till I got nabbed and then they were kinda watching me. Its in my blood bein russian and all. I guess I've been a decent thief my whole life, started when I was real young, dad taught me a few tricks when I was 5 or so. It always hurt me to take from average type folks that werk instead of companies and such that can right it off thru insurance. Fuck this is makin me feel kinda lousy so I'll stop. I havent lifted a thing in 2 years now and its real hard when I see ops' or a decent mark and my morality gets in the way.

[upstate_007]

When i did not have any money or lets ssay when i got on mmt or or was quitting did ya ever notice you NEVER HAVE THE SAME AMOUNT OF MONEY, LIKE YOU DID WHEN U WERE USING DOC...

Once there is no reason to get out there and get the money, all that ambition goes away. When you are on a good run, staying well is all that matters. You will hustle day and night to make sure you don't get sick. Coming up with a couple hundred dollars a day when your using is 'easy', because you have to do it.

[Raisin]

Coming up with a couple hundred dollars a day when your using is 'easy', because you have to do it.[/quote]


I worked harder at being a full timer than most jobs I've had. More stress at the very least.

[upstate_007]

Coming up with a couple hundred dollars a day when your using is 'easy', because you have to do it.

I worked harder at being a full timer than most jobs I've had. More stress at the very least.[/quote]

I hear you. I think I phrased it wrong. It's an easy choice to make to go out there and get money any way you have to to keep things going. When dope is not involved I would never hustle that hard for money.

[Raisin]

Exactly. I've never stolen or pawned anything to pay my rent.

[ZodiacKiller]

I've got enough income to pay all my bills, put gas in my work truck, my wife's car, feed the animals, and all that. And enough to pay for mine and my wife's meds, and the occasional stupid relapse, too.

The problem is that I really, really, need two new guitars. I need them, not just want them.

Can we put together a Zodiac collection fund so I may acquire them? It's really, really important.



ZK

[handsome rob]

When I was at an all time low trying to support a very expensive oxy habit my paycheck was gone in three days. I did everything from taking parents checks, which is the worst I've ever felt, to selling my prized possessions. I sold my Technics 1200's MKII's (the black ones), my PS2, PSP, lots of video games and DVD's, and some jewelry. After that phase, about two and half years ago, I vowed never to pawn my life away again. I threw away my turntables that I used everyday and were what made me happy, all for one night of getting high. I will WD before I ever pull that shit again, it just isn't worth it. My good friend who is an amazing guitar player recently pawned his Dean Dimebag Daryl slime design guitar (not those new Razorback designs), his 7 string, his twelve string, his Peavy XXX amp, speaker, effects pedals, and took out like 4 payday loans. His Slime Dime was just sad to see go, it was an awesome guitar and he almost cried to see it go. I have pretty much gone back to chipping for financial reasons but I start a new drafting job Monday so I will have a bit more fun.

The problem is that I really, really, need two new guitars. I need them, not just want them.
Can we put together a Zodiac collection fund so I may acquire them? It's really, really important.ZK

Too bad, you could have gotten a great deal on some guitars, if you're into those I mentioned.

[ZodiacKiller]

When I was at an all time low trying to support a very expensive oxy habit my paycheck was gone in three days. I did everything from taking parents checks, which is the worst I've ever felt, to selling my prized possessions. I sold my Technics 1200's MKII's (the black ones), my PS2, PSP, lots of video games and DVD's, and some jewelry. After that phase, about two and half years ago, I vowed never to pawn my life away again. I threw away my turntables that I used everyday and were what made me happy, all for one night of getting high. I will WD before I ever pull that shit again, it just isn't worth it. My good friend who is an amazing guitar player recently pawned his Dean Dimebag Daryl slime design guitar (not those new Razorback designs), his 7 string, his twelve string, his Peavy XXX amp, speaker, effects pedals, and took out like 4 payday loans. His Slime Dime was just sad to see go, it was an awesome guitar and he almost cried to see it go. I have pretty much gone back to chipping for financial reasons but I start a new drafting job Monday so I will have a bit more fun.

Too bad, you could have gotten a great deal on some guitars, if you're into those I mentioned.

See, this makes me want to cry, man.....I could NEVER do that. I'd suffer thru a month of WD, weeping, but cradling my guitars. God.....that is sad.....


ZK

[blackdog]

Wellcome to our nightmare,
If ya wanna see sumthin crazy and probally stupid...(take a look in the mirror)
no jes kidden, kinda? anyway what i do and what i have witnesses to that i do, is i collect and save all my used and full "duh" stamps after i crack them and i have full supermarket plastic bags full and they just keep on gettin filled with my used empty stamps. Which i've been told is stupid idea cause it's p.c. for the cops. Hey if the pigs is coming in my room then they allready goy p.c. but i digress......
The main reason i save and keep all my cracked stamps is i try to use them to disgust me into giving second thoughts as to continue doing heron. mwuh hah hah yah like it ever did do that to me, shit i look at them all and i mean all and i just get depressed and go cop and then come home and fix and then add to the collection. Figure minimum one bundle per day usual average sometimes two bundles......so 30 days a month blah blah blah 365 days a year x 10 stamps daily is ummmmm
is ummmm 3thousand 6hundred x 10$ wow thats a lot of money and i usually double that amount so ok call it 50 thousand a year wow!! where the fuck do i get the cash fer all that? and nevermind that but just think what else i could have or could be doing with all these years of that money going in the toilet?? Thats why i save my stamp bags. So sometimes i can give thought to the obvious......bummer huh?
peace /respect
dawg,

[handsome rob]

See, this makes me want to cry, man.....I could NEVER do that. I'd suffer thru a month of WD, weeping, but cradling my guitars. God.....that is sad.....ZK

I wanted to cry watching it. There was some tool at the store the was attempting to shred and I told my friend to school him. He was so depressed about selling it that he wouldn't even touch it for one last play. The only cool part was that a store employee bought the guitar. Not only was he a huge Pantera fan but looked just like a mini Dimebag, at least it went to a good home.

where the fuck do i get the cash fer all that?

It reminds me when people would say "you always have money for dope, why can't you afford subs, or done?" Because I wouldn't do some scandalous shit for something that ain't gonna get me blasted! I'm not going to steal for some suboxone!

[ZodiacKiller]

I wanted to cry watching it. There was some tool at the store the was attempting to shred and I told my friend to school him. He was so depressed about selling it that he wouldn't even touch it for one last play. The only cool part was that a store employee bought the guitar. Not only was he a huge Pantera fan but looked just like a mini Dimebag, at least it went to a good home.

And the worst part of it is I bet he got barely a fraction of what he paid for it all. I also have a Peavey Triple X (in addition to my Marshall, which is now retired), and I love that fuckin' head. Sounds better than my other guitarist in my band's Mesa Dual Rec, which he paid 1800$ for and I got my XXX for 800 right out of the box (at Uncle Bob's). If I ever had to sell it, well, I wouldn't.....no drug is worth my one true passion in life: playing guitar (well, my wife is really my true passion, but ya know what I mean.....)


ZK

[handsome rob]

And the worst part of it is I bet he got barely a fraction of what he paid for it all. I also have a Peavey Triple X (in addition to my Marshall, which is now retired), and I love that fuckin' head. Sounds better than my other guitarist in my band's Mesa Dual Rec, which he paid 1800$ for and I got my XXX for 800 right out of the box (at Uncle Bob's). If I ever had to sell it, well, I wouldn't.....no drug is worth my one true passion in life: playing guitar (well, my wife is really my true passion, but ya know what I mean.....)


ZK

Mesa's rule, I think they have some of the best sound and they last forever. His Triple X was like $1200 new with the head/cabinet. I think he got $350 for it

[ZodiacKiller]

Mesa's rule, I think they have some of the best sound and they last forever. His Triple X was like $1200 new with the head/cabinet. I think he got $350 for it

Well, I ain't gonna argue with ya about Mesa vs. Triple X, but I'm tellin' ya, my XXX sounds better than his Dual Rec.....and the clean channel has some of the sweetest sounds I've ever heard out of a tube-head. A little Chorus on it, and it's got bell-like tones that'd make you wanna weep. But of course, it's got a lot to do with who's playing it, y'know........:cool:

BTW: no response on the ZK guitar benefit???????? damn.....



ZK

[clinton]

Two months ago I sold my 66 fender... A 1966 fender