a fucking miracle -amazed

[candyshop]

took 4 mg subs this am at 24 hrs into the sickness-
am in fucking tears of gratitude
i feel better ,more energetic ,HAPPIER than i have in 2 years is this possible?
it feels too easy so far
i can not believe it
i feel awesome
and hopeful
maybe i can actually get free
is this normal?

[jacky]

well, I am glad to hear that your dilemma is at least temporarily relieved.

yeah, bup can be amazing, escpecially when you do the switch over when dope-sick.
it has its merits to say the least,
but I think maintenance withdrawl can be just as horrible as H, so maybe methadone is the best way to come off of a long time bup maintenance program.

I bet if you started a slow ween off of the bup in 24 days you wouldnt suffer too much though, and maybe it would be a good maintenance drug for you if it seem to life some depression.?

I have seen some people do relatively well on it for long periods of time taking just a few milligrams to micrograms a day.
I have also seen people eating 50-60 milligrams a day and claiming they dont feel a thing , but looking at them is similiar to the methadone patient who is on a few hundred milligrams a day claiming the same thing.
they both look entirely high on the material.

hope you can keep taking the bup as long as you need, are you limited in supply, or getting on a program?

let us know how it goes, there are pros and cons, critics and lovers of the drug, and we are just in the beginning of seeing how this stuff can effect the life of junkys out there, take care! and hang in there.

[candyshop]

i have enough to last a week so trying to get free as quick as i can -4 month wait for the clinic so this is what i got but i have heard a quick taper can be best -wish me luck

[Hammilton]

Is this your first time you've used bupe?

I'll admit, the first times I dosed after being in withdrawal, it was really like lights shone down on me from heaven. The antidepressant effects can leave you feeling hypomanic, even- especially if you're bipolar and prone to SSRI-induced manias. I am, and for a few hours after I dosed during the first three weeks I would be absolutely hypomanic and loved it.

Eventually, though, the lights turn off. I don't know if it's the novelty wearing off, the effect wearing off, or simply falling back into junky thinking and boredom, but eventually the new-found normality (or normalcy as president grover [harding? i absolutely forget the name, but i've got the era in mind] put it) will become a drag.

Remember: drugs are fun because they relieve that normality you're struggling to attain again. Eventually you're gonna want the altered states again. Some people don't get this as bad as others, I had it really easy- but with easy access to the drug and bed-confining pain, I talked myself into going back on the full agonists.

I really gotta disagree with Jacky on one thing though. I've taken as many as 48mg over the course of a few hours and felt absolutely nothing. Felt zilch. No buzz, nothing. I sure as hell didn't look high, either. I was with family (a mixture of people who know about my drug use and those who don't), and my mother- who's very quick to claim that I'm high said nothing.

I honestly feel more on 4mg than 40. I think most people feel the same way and that keeps them from bothering to take more than they're allowed. I do know what you mean about methadone patients taking 200mg a day and supposedly not feeling a thing.

Sometimes I've taken too much methadone, but taken it at much-too extended intervals expecting a buzz but getting nothing for a few hours but then all of a sudden- BANG! I can't keep my eyes open for the life of me.

There's some weird things about methadone I should start a thread about to get some input.

[candyshop]

yes first time with bupe and first time w/out doc for more than 48 hrs in 3 years
and yes bipolar with very weird effects from ssris -either extreme anxiety or exacerbated depression
opiates were a great boon for my depression until ,well they werent
but-i will continue to believe that this will work until i know it won't
i want my freedom very very badly
i feel like i will not live much longer the other way
the guilt and depression and inabilty to function,the constant sickness are more than i can carry
i feel these are very motivating factors
i will get off this ride

[Chemical_Boy]

I am glad that you are feeling decent. I felt real bad for you when I heard your post about being dumped by your doc.

I know how it is to have a 30 supply only last for 3 or 4 days. That happens to me with any week opiate (combo meds of any type, even percs). If I am not careful, a months supply of strong opiates will only last 2 weeks (and even that requires more self control than I would like)

I hope you can find another source, or at least have enough of something to give you a proper taper down schedule if trying to quit permanently.

Good luck Candyshop

[candyshop]

i do not want any more meds -i want off
i will find a way to deal with pain but
this is worse to me than the pain was

[ProdigalSon]

i do not want any more meds -i want off
i will find a way to deal with pain but
this is worse to me than the pain was


Hey good luck Candyshop. Im glad your better

[kyuss]

That's great CS!!

Try to get
your sub dose
as low as possible
as soon as possible
so you don't run out.


It's real easy
to get that junkie need
to do more than is needed

[candyshop]

thank you guys-i heart you all and if i can do this i will still come back here
and so far 4 mgs has held me for 12 hrs -will wait till i start to feel like shit than try 2
i want free as soon as possible
want to just try to get thru like 5 days with subs then try exercise and vitamins or some shit like that
or will try to find a way to get ahold of subs

[Hammilton]

You're bipolar candy? Are you taking a stabilizer- depakote, carbamazepine, or lithium? I know the other things like lamictal or topamax sound good, especially in the weight department, they don't hold up well against things like SSRIs and Bupe in terms of drug-induced mania. Depakote really eased the 'bad cocaine' high you can get the first few hours after taking the bupe. Make it less speedy and angry.

It sure feels good the first couple times, i agree.

[greenfox]

i do not want any more meds -i want off
i will find a way to deal with pain but
this is worse to me than the pain was

Seek and ye shall find; bupe is a godsend.

[Boudica]

Candyshop, me dear, sweet darlin'. I know that "sickness" all too well, and going thru that, on top of having pain from hell, well...me heart just aches for you. So, be strong, get help asap for sub supply, for there is no reason you should have to deal with wd's when there is a doc out there somewhere who will have the compassion to help you. Even giving a walk-in clinic, or getting yourself to the ER and explaining what you're going thru and how determined you are to get your life back should root out a doc who will help get you thru this. It's time for you to stop beating yourself up, regardless of your choices, and find some peace again. I'll be callin' up me goddesses in your behalf, and sending you light and love. Hang in there, girl, you WILL make it.

[candyshop]

thank you so much all of you,for the info,support,well wishes
and mostly just the knowledge that i do not suffer this alone

[tptptp]

I felt like I was wired the first few days on Subs somewhat bothersome, had trouble getting to sleep, even felt high, but it only felt strong when I was sleeping.....I went off for a day to take a nother precscription. I waited a bit 24 hourish not ideal I know but still.... I hadnt taken much sub prior, but I dont tyink what I took was strong enough to get me off, just stabilized me without the bupe....been back on bupe for a few days and im not really feeling that buzz, I started popping extras at first hoping I could catch what I did before but I realized its probably a waste. They do seem to help with depression at least, and for me cravings too....hopefully they dont keep goin downhill.

[flipside]

You know how I feel. Big Hugs, Call you in a bit.

[stormyskier]

Hey, Candyshop, congrats for getting off the merry-go-around. Bupe is a miracle for me and lets me dabble back and forth without being dopesick. If your looking for a doctor try the NAABT.org they have a doctor patient matching system that is great. I found a doc for $25. a month not including the pills. Good luck to you and keep us informed of your progress.
Dianna

[nick]

To be honest sobriety sucks,but it CAN be done.

Much good luck CS and I'll be thinking of you.

[WarmCyanide]

To be honest sobriety sucks,but it CAN be done.

Much good luck CS and I'll be thinking of you.


I think Nick is off the stuff too.



Good luck CS and Nick!

[candyshop]

day 3 -slept 12 hrs last night with no sleep aids and NO SWEATS!! yay!!
holding at 4 mg every 18 hrs.
no benzos or anything else
still feeling optimistic and motivated
i am sure some of this is a honeymoon reaction
and joy at my first glimmer of possible freedom in years but whatever it is i'll fucking take it and be grateful
-still feeling better on subs than i was on the drugs
a little frightened by the ease of this
afraid i do not deserve it and it will be taken from me
no depression
no pain
no lethargy
this is not like my life
i owe whoever invented this shit a blowjob or 10

[Boudica]

CS, we've got some work to do: de-programming them negative emotions, i.e. "This is too good to last, I don't deserve to be able to do this without agony, etc, etc". Your subconscious mind will manifest what IT believes to be true. And as long as these negative programs are in place, they're gonna continue to try like hell to keep you feeling non-deserving, and whatever other emotional threads you've got in place to create some good ol' self-sabatoge. I'm not giving you some lame-duck advice here. I am a hypnotherapist (well at least I was for 7 yrs. till I got too sick to work anymore), and if I had you sitting in my office this is exactly what I'd be telling you. You don't need to pay somebody to get this going for yourself. Just start replacing those negative thought forms every time they start to intrude on your peace and serenity, with the exact oppisite in the form of a positive affirmation/suggestion. Even if you have to do this ten million times a day, do it and I swear to you that you'll be surprised to notice yourself turning around really fast. There is great power, for better or for worse within your own higher self, subconscience mind, or whatever you call that part of yourself. And whenever you can, take a little break and allow yourself to "zone-out" and repeat whatever affirmation feels right for you, like when you start asking yourself "do I deserve this", etc, replace with "I deserve to be free. I deserve to feel good again. I deserve....." Let this become your mantra, allow yourself to feel love flowing thru every fiber of your being. With the power you have within yourself, and the help from the RX, you WILL make it all the way to the other side. And think, what a beautiful place you've got waiting for you. You go, girl.

Tart's gotta go back to bed for a bit. I'll be checkin' in with y'all later.

[nick]

day 3 -slept 12 hrs last night with no sleep aids and NO SWEATS!! yay!!
holding at 4 mg every 18 hrs.
no benzos or anything else
still feeling optimistic and motivated
i am sure some of this is a honeymoon reaction
and joy at my first glimmer of possible freedom in years but whatever it is i'll fucking take it and be grateful
-still feeling better on subs than i was on the drugs
a little frightened by the ease of this
afraid i do not deserve it and it will be taken from me
no depression
no pain
no lethargy
this is not like my life
i owe whoever invented this shit a blowjob or 10

Fuck that CS,you DO deserve peace and happiness and I hope you find it.

Oh and I didn't invent it,but I can spell it-does that qualify me for one at least.

[candyshop]

still feeling like SUPER good-weird
maybe i am a freak of nature and i get really high on 4 mg sub
that would suck if i was just high
i know my tolerance is not super low cuz i went thru 10 bags in the 24 hrs before i quit
am i high ,is that it?
also am experiencing sex drive
forgot about that
some unsuspecting 20 year old boy is gonna get hurt
man i hope i am not high
I CLEANED MY CAR

[devilsdrug]

all right candy good to hear ur enjoyin urself ah that poor lil 20yr old

[kyuss]

still feeling like SUPER good-weird
maybe i am a freak of nature and i get really high on 4 mg sub
that would suck if i was just high
i know my tolerance is not super low cuz i went thru 10 bags in the 24 hrs before i quit
am i high ,is that it?
also am experiencing sex drive
forgot about that
some unsuspecting 20 year old boy is gonna get hurt
man i hope i am not high
I CLEANED MY CAR


Sub gets
my sex drive
going again too.
Also extends my
staying power.
I'm a fan.

[flipside]

Your just 20 right Ky?;)

[southernbelle]

still feeling like SUPER good-weird
maybe i am a freak of nature and i get really high on 4 mg sub
that would suck if i was just high
i know my tolerance is not super low cuz i went thru 10 bags in the 24 hrs before i quit
am i high ,is that it?
also am experiencing sex drive
forgot about that
some unsuspecting 20 year old boy is gonna get hurt
man i hope i am not high
I CLEANED MY CAR

Feel like cleaning MY car? hehehehe, go getcha a 20yr old, girl....:D

[kyuss]

Your just 20 right Ky?;)

In dog years?
yep.
I just turned. :p

[Boudica]

still feeling like SUPER good-weird
maybe i am a freak of nature and i get really high on 4 mg sub
that would suck if i was just high
i know my tolerance is not super low cuz i went thru 10 bags in the 24 hrs before i quit
am i high ,is that it?
also am experiencing sex drive
forgot about that
some unsuspecting 20 year old boy is gonna get hurt
man i hope i am not high
I CLEANED MY CAR


You ARE high, sweetpea. High on life. Somethin' you haven't been able to feel for a long, long time. That, makes me very glad in my heart for you. I sure wish you lived by me, and my kid was not in jail:) . You'd SURE as hell make HIS day!

[Boudica]

Sub gets
my sex drive
going again too.
Also extends my
staying power.
I'm a fan.




Can you come over now, Kyuss Babeeeee:D

[jacky]

maybe bup will hold you at middle ground so to speak.....

I know in the 3-4th day I start getting euphoria when switching from opies to bup.

but after a few weeks I am in the same spot as usual, I start craving some different feeling. I find that salvia divinorum and chaste tree provide me with some effects that seem to mesh with bup well.
supposedly cats claw herb can help keep the bup in your system longer, similiar to how grapefruit works with some opiates/opioids.

my issues with opiates might be different from yours, I have no real intense chronic pain to deal with, I search opiates to calm my anxiety, give myself energy, and help me sleep better through the night generally.
finding that opiate/opioid that allows you to function and have a sex drive and all the good things is hard....for me it is changing around, switch addictions every year to 6 months. but even then things can get redundant and you end up needing to lower dose and maybe take a break.

that is great this stuff is working for you candyshop, some people ween of of bup well, and others have withdrawls for weeks, I have never weened of bup myself, always went running for the standars opiates and kratom after a time.

one thing I noticed about when I was taking kratom only on a daily basis, was that my sex drive was more prominent.

hopefully you can get on this stuff in your area candyshop.

and also, I think a TEAM of scientists created bup, so you may have a group blowjob on your hands!

take care.

[The Lurker]

also am experiencing sex drive
some unsuspecting 20 year old boy is gonna get hurt


I ain't 20 no more (though much better'n most folks 1/2 my age-training and knowledge ;), but I do feel like getting hurt. So, are y'up for it, pain mistress of mine? :rolleyes: I'll do you first, too......no expectations of reciprocity either......



-TL

[chemboy7]

Is this your first time you've used bupe?

I'll admit, the first times I dosed after being in withdrawal, it was really like lights shone down on me from heaven. The antidepressant effects can leave you feeling hypomanic, even- especially if you're bipolar and prone to SSRI-induced manias. I am, and for a few hours after I dosed during the first three weeks I would be absolutely hypomanic and loved it.

Eventually, though, the lights turn off. I don't know if it's the novelty wearing off, the effect wearing off, or simply falling back into junky thinking and boredom, but eventually the new-found normality (or normalcy as president grover [harding? i absolutely forget the name, but i've got the era in mind] put it) will become a drag.

Remember: drugs are fun because they relieve that normality you're struggling to attain again. Eventually you're gonna want the altered states again. Some people don't get this as bad as others, I had it really easy- but with easy access to the drug and bed-confining pain, I talked myself into going back on the full agonists.

I really gotta disagree with Jacky on one thing though. I've taken as many as 48mg over the course of a few hours and felt absolutely nothing. Felt zilch. No buzz, nothing. I sure as hell didn't look high, either. I was with family (a mixture of people who know about my drug use and those who don't), and my mother- who's very quick to claim that I'm high said nothing.

I honestly feel more on 4mg than 40. I think most people feel the same way and that keeps them from bothering to take more than they're allowed. I do know what you mean about methadone patients taking 200mg a day and supposedly not feeling a thing.

Sometimes I've taken too much methadone, but taken it at much-too extended intervals expecting a buzz but getting nothing for a few hours but then all of a sudden- BANG! I can't keep my eyes open for the life of me.

There's some weird things about methadone I should start a thread about to get some input.

I gotta say, I find it quite odd that there are people here claiming to have antidepressant effects or any type of glow at all, even in the beginning of the treatment. When I first started with the bupe (which really wasn't long ago at all really) I'll admitt I was amazed at how well it kept the WD at bay (because without it I would have had one hell of gorilla ready to whomp my ass) but it still drained me of all emotion. I have a love/hate relationship with Bupenorphine; I love that it keeps me well and is fairly easy for me to take breaks with (for the most part) and I can taper on it fast as fuck but I hate that it sucks the soul out of me. The stuff really does make me an emotional zombie, it's a hard feeling to describe really. It just seems to make life really bland and anything that would make me remotely happy w/o the subs has no effect on me, there is only one emotion I can feel on bupe and it permeates everything. It also tends to take away any energy or drive to do anything that I might have had without it. It really is weird how it makes me feel, and I've talked with others that get the same response from the drug. It sure does beat being sick though, so I am definately not complaining. I find that adding good amounts of benzos and OTC sedatives (for lack of better drugs) helps give it alittle pep. I have heard the theory that it is the flavoring agents or Naltrexone or something else in the Suboxone that is responsible for this draining of soul; having never had pure Bupenorphine I couldn't really say... but it's definately an effect, whatever the cause.

[chemboy7]

also am experiencing sex drive
forgot about that
some unsuspecting 20 year old boy is gonna get hurt

Is 25 too old? Hahaha

[candyshop]

I gotta say, I find it quite odd that there are people here claiming to have antidepressant effects or any type of glow at all, even in the beginning of the treatment. When I first started with the bupe (which really wasn't long ago at all really) I'll admitt I was amazed at how well it kept the WD at bay (because without it I would have had one hell of gorilla ready to whomp my ass) but it still drained me of all emotion. I have a love/hate relationship with Bupenorphine; I love that it keeps me well and is fairly easy for me to take breaks with (for the most part) and I can taper on it fast as fuck but I hate that it sucks the soul out of me. The stuff really does make me an emotional zombie, it's a hard feeling to describe really. It just seems to make life really bland and anything that would make me remotely happy w/o the subs has no effect on me, there is only one emotion I can feel on bupe and it permeates everything. It also tends to take away any energy or drive to do anything that I might have had without it. It really is weird how it makes me feel, and I've talked with others that get the same response from the drug. It sure does beat being sick though, so I am definately not complaining. I find that adding good amounts of benzos and OTC sedatives (for lack of better drugs) helps give it alittle pep. I have heard the theory that it is the flavoring agents or Naltrexone or something else in the Suboxone that is responsible for this draining of soul; having never had pure Bupenorphine I couldn't really say... but it's definately an effect, whatever the cause.

fuck that sucks-have to say so far my experience has been the exact opposite
to the point where i am wondering if i am having some sort of manic reaction
dunno-
i used to be bipolar but the 3 years of opies seem to have knocked out the mania (which i loveed) and (after a while ) left the depression part
weird how differently people can react to shit
valium sometimes makes me hyper
diggin it whatever at is

[Boudica]

maybe bup will hold you at middle ground so to speak.....

I know in the 3-4th day I start getting euphoria when switching from opies to bup.

but after a few weeks I am in the same spot as usual, I start craving some different feeling. I find that salvia divinorum and chaste tree provide me with some effects that seem to mesh with bup well.
supposedly cats claw herb can help keep the bup in your system longer, similiar to how grapefruit works with some opiates/opioids.

my issues with opiates might be different from yours, I have no real intense chronic pain to deal with, I search opiates to calm my anxiety, give myself energy, and help me sleep better through the night generally.
finding that opiate/opioid that allows you to function and have a sex drive and all the good things is hard....for me it is changing around, switch addictions every year to 6 months. but even then things can get redundant and you end up needing to lower dose and maybe take a break.

that is great this stuff is working for you candyshop, some people ween of of bup well, and others have withdrawls for weeks, I have never weened of bup myself, always went running for the standars opiates and kratom after a time.

one thing I noticed about when I was taking kratom only on a daily basis, was that my sex drive was more prominent.

hopefully you can get on this stuff in your area candyshop.

and also, I think a TEAM of scientists created bup, so you may have a group blowjob on your hands!

take care.

Jacky, that last sentence was so fucking funny I just had to stop and tell you what a huge grin it gave me. Needed that!:D

[candyshop]

today i went down to 2 mg.
and i feel like shit
no options though cuz i only have 1/2 of an 8 mg left
any advice for feeling less shitty
not it full blown wd but sweaty achy and tired/grim
will full wd's come back sunday when i am out?
i cannot bear the thought of feeling that again

[nick]

today i went down to 2 mg.
and i feel like shit
no options though cuz i only have 1/2 of an 8 mg left
any advice for feeling less shitty
not it full blown wd but sweaty achy and tired/grim
will full wd's come back sunday when i am out?
i cannot bear the thought of feeling that again

Just hang tight and keep going-it gets easier.


You can only do your best Sis.


Hot baths helped me and streeching.In the end time is the only answer.

Much good luck and keep us posted.

[Diluted]

Everytime I detox I remember this sign in the Buckley house at Eugene, Oregon

It was like a Cleareyes Eye, you know, before Ben Stein drops the water on it -- it's all blood shot and evil..
and it said:
REMEMBER SLEEP WILL COME

God, just those weeks waiting for sleep are the worst part.

[Frozen]

Candyshop, I'm afraid that just one week on bupe isn't going to be able to reverse all of the changes done to your brain by years of full-agonist use. Some bupe patients are able to taper down to nothing, but this typically seems to take 6 to 12 months on bupe, with a slow, gradual taper.

This has already been suggested to you, but it's worth repeating: You can find a bupe doc through the NAABT physician locator: http://www.naabt.org/patient_doctor/splash.cfm

Nancy Barmashi (NAABT admin) is an angel- If you come to her for help, I know she'll do her best to find you a bupe doc. Best of luck...

[greenfox]

Candyshop, I'm afraid that just one week on bupe isn't going to be able to reverse all of the changes done to your brain by years of full-agonist use. Some bupe patients are able to taper down to nothing, but this typically seems to take 6 to 12 months on bupe, with a slow, gradual taper.

This has already been suggested to you, but it's worth repeating: You can find a bupe doc through the NAABT physician locator: http://www.naabt.org/patient_doctor/splash.cfm

Nancy Barmashi (NAABT admin) is an angel- If you come to her for help, I know she'll do her best to find you a bupe doc. Best of luck...

I dunnooo for me it's different I use when i want don't use when i don't want. Maybe Im a freak.

[tptptp]

I dunnooo for me it's different I use when i want don't use when i don't want. Maybe Im a freak.

Thats obviously atypical

[kyuss]

Can you come over now, Kyuss Babeeeee:D


pm me
yer address :)
I just snorted
4 mgs

[Frozen]

Originally Posted by irishtart http://forum.opiophile.org/images/gnome/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://forum.opiophile.org/showthread.php?p=109265#post109265)
Can you come over now, Kyuss Babeeeee:D

pm me
yer address :)
I just snorted
4 mgs

Don't bother- He's hung like a bird. :p

[AWOL]

i owe whoever invented this shit a blowjob or 10 *steps forward*

[kyuss]

Originally Posted by irishtart http://forum.opiophile.org/images/gnome/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://forum.opiophile.org/showthread.php?p=109265#post109265)
Can you come over now, Kyuss Babeeeee:D



Don't bother- He's hung like a bird. :p




http://www.abc.net.au/science/news/img/argenduck.jpg

:rolleyes:

[candyshop]

Candyshop, I'm afraid that just one week on bupe isn't going to be able to reverse all of the changes done to your brain by years of full-agonist use. Some bupe patients are able to taper down to nothing, but this typically seems to take 6 to 12 months on bupe, with a slow, gradual taper.

This has already been suggested to you, but it's worth repeating: You can find a bupe doc through the NAABT physician locator: http://www.naabt.org/patient_doctor/splash.cfm

Nancy Barmashi (NAABT admin) is an angel- If you come to her for help, I know she'll do her best to find you a bupe doc. Best of luck...
did use the dr search -there is on withinn my area-there has been progress-they are down to a 2 month waitlist

[WarmCyanide]

we all support ya here! keep it up.

[candyshop]

am out now and feel super shitty -time to find drugs

[nick]

am out now and feel super shitty -time to find drugs

Be careful sis.

[AWOL]

am out now and feel super shitty -time to find drugs I found alcohol, too bad the rest of you don't enjoy it. mmmmmm :drink:

[WarmCyanide]

I found alcohol, too bad the rest of you don't enjoy it. mmmmmm :drink:



was it between the couch cushions?


i get mine from the garage.

im mixing it rx cough syrup you sissy.

may soggy, mile long candy canes whip you all into dark matter

chicken wing flavored belches with earaches, sore throats and the history channel.

like that.

[Euphoricgirl]

Hugs Candy! You can do it or at least I pray you can. I guess I am just not strong enough. Goodluck and prayers.

[AWOL]

was it between the couch cushions?


i get mine from the garage.

im mixing it rx cough syrup you sissy.

may soggy, mile long candy canes whip you all into dark matter

chicken wing flavored belches with earaches, sore throats and the history channel.

like that.damn Gina, you so crazy!

[The Lurker]

I found alcohol, too bad the rest of you don't enjoy it. mmmmmm :drink:

First I found sex. Then I found drugs.

Then, I found God.

Turns out God was doin' sex and drugs. (lucky bastard....)

Kinda explains a few things, ya know? Like duckbilled platypuses. Or why a man's libido shrinks after the first time, while a woman just gets even more horny.


Hang in there, girl. Have some positive vibes (ommmmm.........)

-TL

[kyuss]

am out now and feel super shitty -time to find drugs

hell
I've got drugs
and still feel shitty

[candyshop]

i got in the clinic-got subs
THEY ARE AWESOME!!!!
i am happier than i have been in years
they HAVE to market this stuff as an anti-depressant
ZERO cravings,depression,lethargy
this has been the happiest week of my life in years
i may actually prefer subs to other drugs
very weird

[tptptp]

i may actually prefer subs to other drugs
very weird

I feel the same way, some highs may feel better, but when it wears off (but still before any WD) I feel worse, somehwta depressed. Bupe is a good stabilizer. I feel like I did before opiates except that I have alot less depression and more motivation. Maybe opiate addiction was a blessing in disguise....now if only for the price dilemna things would be great!

My friend feels the same way, he had pods the other day and while he got a decent high (nothing great) he was still craving the bupe, believe it or not! The only problem is he is snorting because of cost which isnt the best thing to do health-wise. Its also psychologically a more fiending behavior for him and he feels like hes "using" whereas orally he doesnt feel that way and it does help break that mental "using" barrier. Another problem is, possibly because of his metabolism he ideally needs to dose twice daily and the stuff keeps him up at night if he takes at within like 8 hours of going to sleep & that too doesnt help with the psychological feeling of using.

The only question is, is this just a short honeymoon phase?? Time will tell

[candyshop]

at 2 weeks and still feeling pretty dang good

saved up all the money i would have spent on "wellness" in the past week and bought my son a wii


still amazed at the antidepressant / motivational affect (or effect-so close in possible usage i always get confused)-much better than any of the many psych meds i have failed to get relief from

feel better than before the drugs

not as fun as 120 mg of oc or a few bags
but day to day just knowing i will not feel like shit and that my situation is stable is awesome

obviously the response to any drug is an individual experience
but i would urge anyone who is considering subs to give it a shot

i NEVER thought i would be functional without real drugs

[Seedy]

^^ Sounds like it's what you needed, nice one. I hope they keep working for you. Makes me think it could be worth a try. I'd have to order over the net, could be expensive but if it works...

[tptptp]

Good job CS - If you plan to use I advise once a month binge for 3 days or less, maximum because I just had a two day binge where i barely even got high for 2 days and going back to subs my tolerance to tyhem has about doubled and dont seem to pack the same punch even then. Or binge whenever you hit a certain mark, like say 4mg or less.

Seedy - give them a shot man. I am glad I did. It would probably be wise to bum a couple from a friend first to see how they make you feel. As many keep saying with bupe less is more. I feel better taking 6mg than 16, UNLESS my tolerance is to the point where I need 16 obviously, like after a binge.....so ill take the 16 to get well but taking that 16 or more wont make me feel as good as taking just a 6, and its not because that I only need like 4 when I take 6. I think low doses may be better for depression. At least mine. I've had major depression my entire life and been on bupe about a month and feel much better. Take away depression and my opiate cravings are slim. Many dont feel the same but I'm sure many of those never had major depression either, and possibly use for other reasons.

Another good thing about bupe is I *THINK* bupe doesnt crate new receptors so thats always a good thing, cause methadone does I *think* not too sure on that one though, so please keep your virtual wangs in your pants folks.

[jacky]

hey candyshop....
have you tried effexor?

the antidep. effexor and tramadol the opioid pain reliever are very similiar in structure...so much so that I think data that suggests they BOTH have effect on opioid/serotonin/dopamine systems.

the data about effexor's opioid agonist effect is fairly new.

I had a Doctor prescribe me effexor just because he heard that recovering heroin addicts seemed to like it.
I bet they did/do!

the first few times I took effexor I could feel obvious stimulation, and the stuff has some definite tolerance curve with regular use, and resulting withdrawl effects when the medication is stopped.

just thought that you might find that interesting because you have some history of depression, and just in case you want to get off of bup in the future and start another med that might effect similiar "centers".

its nice to hear a few "success" stories inbetween the overdose news.

[Seedy]

Seedy - give them a shot man. I am glad I did. It would probably be wise to bum a couple from a friend first to see how they make you feel. As many keep saying with bupe less is more. I feel better taking 6mg than 16, UNLESS my tolerance is to the point where I need 16 obviously, like after a binge.....so ill take the 16 to get well but taking that 16 or more wont make me feel as good as taking just a 6, and its not because that I only need like 4 when I take 6. I think low doses may be better for depression. At least mine. I've had major depression my entire life and been on bupe about a month and feel much better. Take away depression and my opiate cravings are slim. Many dont feel the same but I'm sure many of those never had major depression either, and possibly use for other reasons..

The problem is I don't know any other opiate users in my city. The waiting list to get on a methadone program in New Zealand is months to a year and I believe only hardened junkies are considered. Subs are pretty new here so I'd say it would be even harder to legitimately get on them. I know of one site which sells subs (temgesic I think. Same thing?) but not in small quantities. Haven't looked too hard though.