Lost In Juarez in the Rain and it's Eastertime Too

[Duckfeet]

I really am happy to have found this site. It's hardnosed...u, we, me, can be hard on people, we can be suspicious, cynical...u can get yer feelings hurt, and that sux. I've been harder lately, and have respect for people that are. But like a guy in the pen once said...I can dish it out, but I can take it too, when it seemed like the whole pod was doing the dozens on him, insulting him, his ma, anything we could think of...and I know what he meant. It ain't always candybars....It's a price we pay for having a good site. And there's good info, if yer willing to read between the lines, u can get some useful stuff.

If u have an unbelievable story, well, there's a reason it's "unbelievable." It's not personal. Just to keep this place the righteous site it is, we have to discourage people who are imaginative and good writers from getting carried away. I've pretty much gotten slack, from the get-go. I know that. But I've been careful too, and I'm ready to come out swinging if somebody says: "no way, fuckhead...", because I *know*, I expect it. When I tell some exciting story about swimming the Rio Grande with dope between my teeth, I'm going to get shit...and whether or not it fucking *happened* doesn't matter, not really. It's not personal. But I'll say one more time: this is *not* a creative writing workshop. If I tell a whopper like the Rio Grande backstroke dealie, I better be prepared to fight, but at the same time, I need understand that even some "truths" are too fucking unbelievable to be forcing people to say: "ah old Duckfeet, poor guy, he's imagining things in his really boring life, he's probably really fourteen, with zits...."

I'm headed downtown. I wanted things too easy. Now I got to pay, go "looking," and the thrill is gone, to say the least...

But a shot of H, to me, means as much as it did thirty years ago...and I want to extend my...Open Invitation To The Blues....

[slugbone]

i totally agree brother duckfeet. the only thing i have left anymore to hang my hat on is my credibilty, in "real life" it aint so good anymore, so this site is the only place left where honesty is critical for me.

for what it's worth i respect all you opiophiles and this place is a pretty damned important part of who i am. i hope you guys understand what i'm tryin to say here

[jab]

But when gravity fails will the negativity pull you through?

Just remember.. the cops don't need you and man they expect the same.

Good post duck.

[OxyContinuously]

I really am happy to have found this site. It's hardnosed...u, we, me, can be hard on people, we can be suspicious, cynical...u can get yer feelings hurt, and that sux. I've been harder lately, and have respect for people that are. But like a guy in the pen once said...I can dish it out, but I can take it too, when it seemed like the whole pod was doing the dozens on him, insulting him, his ma, anything we could think of...and I know what he meant. It ain't always candybars....It's a price we pay for having a good site. And there's good info, if yer willing to read between the lines, u can get some useful stuff.

If u have an unbelievable story, well, there's a reason it's "unbelievable." It's not personal. Just to keep this place the righteous site it is, we have to discourage people who are imaginative and good writers from getting carried away. I've pretty much gotten slack, from the get-go. I know that. But I've been careful too, and I'm ready to come out swinging if somebody says: "no way, fuckhead...", because I *know*, I expect it. When I tell some exciting story about swimming the Rio Grande with dope between my teeth, I'm going to get shit...and whether or not it fucking *happened* doesn't matter, not really. It's not personal. But I'll say one more time: this is *not* a creative writing workshop. If I tell a whopper like the Rio Grande backstroke dealie, I better be prepared to fight, but at the same time, I need understand that even some "truths" are too fucking unbelievable to be forcing people to say: "ah old Duckfeet, poor guy, he's imagining things in his really boring life, he's probably really fourteen, with zits...."

I'm headed downtown. I wanted things too easy. Now I got to pay, go "looking," and the thrill is gone, to say the least...

But a shot of H, to me, means as much as it did thirty years ago...and I want to extend my...Open Invitation To The Blues....


Duckfeet, I totally agree with you. I dance on the edge of reason, I guess you could say, teetering on the cliff's edge between the totally outrageous and the completely plausible, regarding some of the things that have happened in my short, though experienced life. Some would call it sad, and I could write volumes on why I am unhappy with this, or acrmonious toward that, or still, accepting toward such and such. This is the nature of the life that we live, as people, as addicts. It does no good to surmise all the "what if's" and the "I shouda done's" because if you do, you're not living your life, your living in a bubble. We have to have thick skin. There are going to be people that don't like us. Some of them will have good reason, others are total assholes. That just comes with the territory. Above all, since this is a place to congregate, to get advice, to sit and bullshit, to gather information and a myriad of other things, we have to be true to ourselves.

To me, there is a stark difference between good, eloquent writing, and what is fabricated. It's all too easy to "spice" up a story by adding or deleting things, that by doing so, "make a better story." Personally, I think if one is here for the sole reason of "telling stories," then the entire purpose and value of the site is lost. Any old Joe can sit on his Dell on Microsoft Word and create a piece of creative writing. Like everything else in life, there is an appropriate time and place. Not to mention that the people that are true here, can obviously tell the difference, rather quickly I might add, between the truth and sublime, ethereal nonsense that screams of dishonesty. I try to take everything and everyone as they come, but as DF says, I can also know when to call a spade a spade, and also receive any criticism that I receive, and try my best to learn from it. The way i can sum it up is by saying that if something sound too good to be tru it usually is, but if it's not, don't get mad at the person who called you out--if it's true than who gives a shit?

That's all I have to say regarding that, but I really do agree that creative writing certainly has a time and a place.

Oxy

[nick]

On this site giving out false information could really screw someone up.
DF bro,I know you know what you're doing,but take care out there.You never know and one mistake can lead to..............

[repeek]

Ya, just about everyone knows there is not enough water in the Rio Grande to swim, in some places you can walk accross without even getting your feet wet, at least in Juarez.

You have to look me up DF if ever you are down this way.

[devilsdrug]

shit ive been tellin all these lies for so many years the real truth has blurred aint it that way for u df , just kiddin every thing ive ever said was true , nothings blurred my memory is perfect , i mean habitual use of alcohol , barbituites , and opiates, that wont hurt ur memory will it, oh yah dont forget the dredded weed

[AWOL]

I have a couple unbelievable stories, but I already know (and expect) that nobody would believe them because there's no way I'd believe anyone else with the same story. In the end I've come to realise that it's probably best to just keep them to myself because I know they're not believable (even if they are true). People who don't know you and weren't there have every reason to be suspicious, because 99% of the time when something sounds unbelievable it usually is. I have two experiences in my life that I realise nobody in their right mind should believe, it would be a waste of my time trying to prove them online. I'm sure the older guys have a lot more than 2, but I never see them talk about them. I guess with age comes wisdom eh.


shit ive been tellin all these lies for so many years the real truth has blurred aint it that way for u df , just kiddin every thing ive ever said was true , nothings blurred my memory is perfect , i mean habitual use of alcohol , barbituites , and opiates, that wont hurt ur memory will it, oh yah dont forget the dredded weed


No shit, considering all the brain damage I've inflicted on myself I'm surprised I can remember my social security number any more.

[repeek]

There are outrages stories, that I could believe, because I have seen a lot of really weird stuff go down over the years. So, it is good to know that a policy exists to call one on ones siht.

Just like I know there is no water in the Rio Grande at Juarez, someone else knows there are no homeless in Westside Ft. Worth, or some detail someone might throw in about Manhattans lower east side. As soon as I heard Fry’s story in the dental office I knew a million little pieces was a lot of BS, and just like he got called on his siht, so do we.

It’s a good thing.

[Duckfeet]

Well, speaking of stories. Here's mine for tonight. I didn't have no luck in SD today, I'm such a lame...I think I look like an old cop or something. Anyway, I actually do have a little money set aside, So I got on Travelocity, and got a roundtrip ticket to Vancouver. I'll leave tomorrow morning, get there a little after noon. Get me a room downtown Eastside somewhere. I begin my cancer radiation treatments on 22nd, which is a monday, so I'll come back that Sunday. Gives me ten days to screw around up there, go to safe injection site, see if I can get more info on NAOMI, (which is part of that heroin maintenance trials they got going on up there)...It's like my "plan B" or something...it sounds like they leave plain old "users" alone up there, so I won't have to look over my shoulder...felt like going *somewhere,* and I really do want to see if that progam will be continued, or not...plus, I'm a quick study, maybe I can find my main med up there, knudge knudge wink wink.

My laptop is fried, and I don't feel like lugging my Mac Mini up there, so I'll find an Inet Cafe or something, check in w/my fellow opiophiles. Need to get off by myself a bit for I begin the treatments anyway, get things in order, figure out what next move is. But I"m all excited, anyway, and any opiophiles up that way, or anybody *been* up that way, got some pointers on where to stay, whatever, I'm clueless, so fire away...so got me ol' passport, goin where I never been before. I'll be flying over yer house DD, watchout!

DF

[devilsdrug]

scuse me sir no aerial photographs on this flight

[Duckfeet]

scuse me sir no aerial photographs on this flight

Yah, I won't pee out the window when I go by....

[OxyContinuously]

Well, speaking of stories. Here's mine for tonight. I didn't have no luck in SD today, I'm such a lame...I think I look like an old cop or something. Anyway, I actually do have a little money set aside, So I got on Travelocity, and got a roundtrip ticket to Vancouver. I'll leave tomorrow morning, get there a little after noon. Get me a room downtown Eastside somewhere. I begin my cancer radiation treatments on 22nd, which is a monday, so I'll come back that Sunday. Gives me ten days to screw around up there, go to safe injection site, see if I can get more info on NAOMI, (which is part of that heroin maintenance trials they got going on up there)...It's like my "plan B" or something...it sounds like they leave plain old "users" alone up there, so I won't have to look over my shoulder...felt like going *somewhere,* and I really do want to see if that progam will be continued, or not...plus, I'm a quick study, maybe I can find my main med up there, knudge knudge wink wink.

My laptop is fried, and I don't feel like lugging my Mac Mini up there, so I'll find an Inet Cafe or something, check in w/my fellow opiophiles. Need to get off by myself a bit for I begin the treatments anyway, get things in order, figure out what next move is. But I"m all excited, anyway, and any opiophiles up that way, or anybody *been* up that way, got some pointers on where to stay, whatever, I'm clueless, so fire away...so got me ol' passport, goin where I never been before. I'll be flying over yer house DD, watchout!

DF

DF, I didn't know you you were getting cancer treatments. You're in my thoughts, bro, and I hope that works out. Actually, who am I kidding? A tough guy like you? Cancer ain't SHIT. You got this. (Seriously though, I hope all goes well 4 u :-)

Oxy

[flipside]

Duck you promised to call before you left. I've tried to reach you today, now I know where you were and where you are at. Please call me as soon as you get a chance. You promised you woulnd't run out on me without a call first..you know how much I care and how much I'll worry if we don't speak before you go. Please keep in touch. I love you my bother in arms, be safe. I hope you find what your looking for.

I wish I had more to offer and could shoulder this pain for you.

[southernbelle]

I didn't know you were getting cancer treatments either. I hope everything goes well for you and you're not in too much discomfort. Please keep us informed, we care about you!

[Ragdoll]

Oh, Ducky...bro, I didn't know, either. You're in my best thoughts and I'm sending those thoughts, along with my prayers, on an express Greyhound headed south and protected by four blue elephants...

http://clicksmilies.com/s1106/tiere/animal-smiley-041.gif http://clicksmilies.com/s1106/tiere/animal-smiley-041.gif http://clicksmilies.com/s1106/tiere/animal-smiley-041.gif http://clicksmilies.com/s1106/tiere/animal-smiley-041.gif

...and one very, very special green balloon with a note inside that says

"WE LOVE YOU, MR. DUCK"

http://clicksmilies.com/s1106/spezial/jasons_smilie/balloon.gif

[blackdog]

i totally agree brother duckfeet. the only thing i have left anymore to hang my hat on is my credibilty, in "real life" it aint so good anymore, so this site is the only place left where honesty is critical for me.

for what it's worth i respect all you opiophiles and this place is a pretty damned important part of who i am. i hope you guys understand what i'm tryin to say here
yeah it sure is a bitch......having all the drunks looking down at me for being a user of that ilicit drug of ill-repuit...heroin ooohhh. damn moronic aint it?

[Curio]

you going to the fred hutchinson treatment center up there?

I grew up in central Oregon and we did fund raising in high school for a kid who needed a bone marrow transplant and I recall him and his family going there...supposed to be the top notch cancer experts.....

let us know if you need anything....bone marrow/blood type match, etc....I'd do it in a heartbeat...just say the word.

[flipside]

you going to the fred hutchinson treatment center up there?

I grew up in central Oregon and we did fund raising in high school for a kid who needed a bone marrow transplant and I recall him and his family going there...supposed to be the top notch cancer experts.....

let us know if you need anything....bone marrow/blood type match, etc....I'd do it in a heartbeat...just say the word.


No CT, He is having his treatment here in San Deigo, just taking a quick vacation and checking out the H maintence scene there. With the type of CA he has he shouldn't need bone marrow or anything like that or I'd have been there already along with a lot of us I'm sure. Very sweet of you though. Did you get my response to your e-mail?