What to say to Dr.

[OpiateHead]

Let me give a little bit of background. I have had severe migraines for close to 3 years now. I was born with optic nerve damage which has destroyed my vision in my right eye (I'm completely blind in that eye) and my vision is failing in my left eye. I have taken a myriad of drugs for this problem. With my first doctor, we tried Fiornal, Imitrex (which I'm allergic to), Topomax, Prednizone, and a couple of others that I can't remember their names. When all of those didn't work, the Dr. told me there was nothing else that he can do for me. I started to see another doctor who sympathized with my plight and gave me a script of VicodinES. Two months later, that same doctor was in jail for some problems with the IRS. So now I'm back to no doctor and no medication. I have an appointment to see another doctor today, but I know that doctors don't like to prescribe narcotics for migraines.. but I don't know what else to do and this is the only thing that I've found that seems to work.

Any suggestions on what I can possibly say to him to make him more sympathetic to me?

[jacobs ladder]

bottom line man if you feel you need something and it truthfully works for you , you will find someone who will prescribe it. Try just leveling with your doctor, explain how youve taken it prior to this visit and it worked well. Bring some supporting evidence with you. When i started havuing anxiety i knew i wanted to be on a benzo of some kind, so i printed a bunch of information on ativan, brought it in a showed him. I explained that it is what i wanted to try and he didnt hesitate to write me a script. I also suffer from chronic bronchitis, and whenever i get sick the first thing i ask him for is hc tussive. YOu just need to be vocal about your pain, speak , and dont take no for an answer.

[Babydollangel]

I have suffered migranes in the past....opies ARE the best remedy (but hell i swear they will cure ALL that ails ya..hehe)
What i have learned --not going against the above poster---BUTTT sometimes you have to act like you know a little less than you actually do....for some reason if you do your research, know what works for you, you have to be very careful going about the actual asking for it..A little too much knowledge has worked against me a time or two..i dunno, just my expereince...its a tough call..you know what you want, what works, what will help you, but to actually ASK for it is the hard part. IMO, that is. its just a matter of how you ask sometimes that will determine if and what you get.
I have said before that 'a friend of mine takes such and such and it helps her' sort of thing.

[vaxn8]

If you tell the truth to a doc and are being honest, you will find a doc that will help. It may take several different docs though before you find the right one. Most docs are very reluctant to prescribe opiates for headaches (other than brain tumor related ones) because many of them believe they cause rebound headaches that are worse. Whether this is true or not is another issue!

Evidence of what you have tried would be very helpful, records especially. It will make your case more believable. They listen to lots of people coming in with headaches or some other semi-minor problem who will just march in and say I can't take this, this or this (usually naming all of the nsaids and migraine drugs).

[nick]

I think there are only two ways to go here.One,you level with him total honesty and hope he doesn't think you're a junky looking to get high or two,you don't mention opiates at all and hope he gives you some.If I were desperate I'd go for the first option.Good luck.

[antony]

If you're telling the truth on your post, and you got the medical records, plus the proof that your old doctors a jail bird, you're straight as shit.

btw, are you in chicago, cuz i know of a doc thats doing A LOT of time, for fucking over the IRS, and medicare.

[RobOC]

I had my sub doc find out how much I knew about pharms, and his next words were "because of your extensive knowledge about drugs I need to be very careful in what I prescribe you." In other words, I dont get any good shit from him. I corrected my pain doc on the amount of APAP in norco and that got him a little susicious. Fuck, a pain doc should know there is 325mg of APAP in norco.

[antony]

I had my sub doc find out how much I knew about pharms, and his next words were "because of your extensive knowledge about drugs I need to be very careful in what I prescribe you." In other words, I dont get any good shit from him. I corrected my pain doc on the amount of APAP in norco and that got him a little susicious. Fuck, a pain doc should know there is 325mg of APAP in norco.

yea, you gotta becareful. I've been seeing my doc, for like 3yrs. and never have called any medicine by a name. He'll write me a script for my es's, and i'll say "can I get some of those other things you gave me?" meaning 90 somas, "yea sure ant, anything else?"

"then i say, some of these, some of those, those are cute, and ooh, whats that?" and I'm on my way.

[OpiateHead]

Thank you everyone for your response. I'm heading to my Dr. now. I think I'm going to just level with him and if need be, I can produce tears. Because the migraines have gotten to the point that I am not able to function once I have them and massive ones stay for days. I know that I've seen other posts of people saying that they were praying for death and I can completely empathize. I've had being too knowledgeable definitely get in my way before, so I know to be a bit wary of that approach.. but at the same time, not being knowledgeable enough gets you out the door paying for something that is not going to help. I'll let you know how it goes.

Wish me luck.

[OpiateHead]

If you're telling the truth on your post, and you got the medical records, plus the proof that your old doctors a jail bird, you're straight as shit.

btw, are you in chicago, cuz i know of a doc thats doing A LOT of time, for fucking over the IRS, and medicare.

No, not in Chicago. I'm in Southern California.

[OpiateHead]

Evidence of what you have tried would be very helpful, records especially. It will make your case more believable. They listen to lots of people coming in with headaches or some other semi-minor problem who will just march in and say I can't take this, this or this (usually naming all of the nsaids and migraine drugs).

The only problem with the medical records is I heard from the office staff that when he left, all of his office belongings were placed into a public storage facility, where the staff was unable to pay the bill and lost the contents of the unit. So I don't know where my records are or how to locate them.

[northernstar]

I have suffered migranes in the past....opies ARE the best remedy (but hell i swear they will cure ALL that ails ya..hehe)
What i have learned --not going against the above poster---BUTTT sometimes you have to act like you know a little less than you actually do....for some reason if you do your research, know what works for you, you have to be very careful going about the actual asking for it..A little too much knowledge has worked against me a time or two..i dunno, just my expereince...its a tough call..you know what you want, what works, what will help you, but to actually ASK for it is the hard part. IMO, that is. its just a matter of how you ask sometimes that will determine if and what you get.
I have said before that 'a friend of mine takes such and such and it helps her' sort of thing.


ya.....asking for specific painkillers by name is one of the "red flags" for DSB-"DRUG SERCHING BEHAVIOR"....IF you show him a copy of your old script, whatever else...and be like " whatever this is, its the only thing that has worked so far...and i need it back cuz i cant sleep now and iam in fucking PAIN" LOL haveing a legitamet need for something should negate the DSB in knowing what it is you need....but thats the world we live in...

[northernstar]

The only problem with the medical records is I heard from the office staff that when he left, all of his office belongings were placed into a public storage facility, where the staff was unable to pay the bill and lost the contents of the unit. So I don't know where my records are or how to locate them.


computers man! if your insured the insurence company will have record of anything they paid for...or the pharmacy it was filled at!~

[vanilla_mlkshake2007]

Actually I found my sub DR the most understanding out of all of them.I was just honest with him and told him how awful the subs make me feel and that my other DRS will prescibe vicodins ,Darvocets and even occasionally percocets but that I know these contain too much APAP which isn't good for smeone with Chirosis of the Liver.
I also mentioned that because I could get only APAP opiates that is what made me eventially go out on the streets and buy Kadiens and Morphines because they helped so much but yet I knew they weren't AS damaging to my liver and now he has me on Methadone for pain which at first he was totally against prescribing.
After almost a year on subs this DR has began to trust me more and I am feeling alot better with the methadone then I was when I was getting 1-2 darvocets a day.I mean that is pitiful.Might as well be a recovering drug addict.
Actually I wish I would have found out what Morphine withdrawals are compared to Darvocet withdrawals.HEHE I'm just kidding because any opiate withdrawal is bad and I love getting high.
I just get high half the month on methadones and halfd the month on morphines.

[OpiateHead]

I went in and was completely honest with him and I partially got what I want. He gave me a script of Elavil (sp?) and a script of 30 Vicodin and wants me to come back in a month for more. I also have a bottle of 20 Tylenol #3 lying around the house too. So I'm going to make these last me for a while (keeping fingers crossed).

Thank you to everyone for your help.

[RobOC]

Elavil is an antipychotic when prescribed in extremely high doses. It is prescibed to pain patients because over time it helps to raise your pairn threshold and it will help you sleep. it is amitryptaline, i think i spelled that wrong.

[vaxn8]

Elavil is an antipychotic


It is an antidepressant actually. It can be very helpful for both pain and sleep, different for each person.

[orangejuice]

someone correct me if im wrong, but doesnt elavil also potentiate some opiates/opiods?? or it could be opposite. i forget. ima look it up again.

[dorje]

What to say to Doc is:
Doctor, Doctor, Mr. M.D., Please tell me what's wrtong with me. Then say If you don't gives me my dope I will call the AMA and ruin your career. No more golf..think about it

Works everytime.. Pharmaceutical grade opium,Dilaudid,Opana,Kadian,etc. Watch out that etc can knock you around some..

[antony]

What to say to Doc is:
Doctor, Doctor, Mr. M.D., Please tell me what's wrtong with me. Then say If you don't gives me my dope I will call the AMA and ruin your career. No more golf..think about it

Works everytime.. Pharmaceutical grade opium,Dilaudid,Opana,Kadian,etc. Watch out that etc can knock you around some..


For some reason I have a sneaking suspicion that the AMA wouldn't give a fuck, unless the guy has been called on numerous (dozens) times.

What are gonna tell them? My head hurts really badly and he wouldn't give me high powered opiates that I (<----key word) think will work for me.

[mikells43]

i think ur trying to get narcotics to feed ur addiction and ur addiction tells u that u have bad headaches and they get worse when u dont have dope to put out the fire. thats what i think cuase i was u at one point, it makes me releived that im not th only one who plays those games. come one man "what to tell the doc" holey fuck if that isn't a cry for help to help u narrrate a story to fake ur shit to get dope. ur doc dont wanna give u narcs cause he done want ot loose his ass and also cause ur young and he prob dont wanna turn u into a dope feind that will suck cock for a fix. get real with urself ur only liying to u. ur prob gonna tkae offense to this post but i dont care cause i wish someone would have said this to me when i frst started and mabey i wouldnt be here where im at today a hopeless junkie, but im clean and thats all that counts. get reall with urself ur in denyal. i can see it prob others can but u can't cause when in denyal one can't see it

[mikells43]

What to say to Doc is:
Doctor, Doctor, Mr. M.D., Please tell me what's wrtong with me. Then say If you don't gives me my dope I will call the AMA and ruin your career. No more golf..think about it

Works everytime.. Pharmaceutical grade opium,Dilaudid,Opana,Kadian,etc. Watch out that etc can knock you around some..




holey christ lol im gonna print this shit out and take it to a 6th grade class on drug prevention day and show it ot the kids, see what opiates will make u say and do. pretty soon ull be soo hooked that ull even perform oral sex to someone to get them. god damn. im a member of the ama .... we are drug addicts.... they give a fuck abotu drug addicts, good luck cause they are gonna laugh in ur face cause they dont give a fuck. tehres people dying otu there with cancer and shit . they dont wanna feed some junkie thats gonna use up a 30 day supply in a week come on get real with urself

[antony]

i think ur trying to get narcotics to feed ur addiction and ur addiction tells u that u have bad headaches and they get worse when u dont have dope to put out the fire. thats what i think cuase i was u at one point, it makes me releived that im not th only one who plays those games. come one man "what to tell the doc" holey fuck if that isn't a cry for help to help u narrrate a story to fake ur shit to get dope. ur doc dont wanna give u narcs cause he done want ot loose his ass and also cause ur young and he prob dont wanna turn u into a dope feind that will suck cock for a fix. get real with urself ur only liying to u. ur prob gonna tkae offense to this post but i dont care cause i wish someone would have said this to me when i frst started and mabey i wouldnt be here where im at today a hopeless junkie, but im clean and thats all that counts. get reall with urself ur in denyal. i can see it prob others can but u can't cause when in denyal one can't see it

you used to suck cock for dope?

[mikells43]

you used to suck cock for dope?



lol no that came from bob saget on half baked

[mikells43]

Actually I found my sub DR the most understanding out of all of them.I was just honest with him and told him how awful the subs make me feel and that my other DRS will prescibe vicodins ,Darvocets and even occasionally percocets but that I know these contain too much APAP which isn't good for smeone with Chirosis of the Liver.
I also mentioned that because I could get only APAP opiates that is what made me eventially go out on the streets and buy Kadiens and Morphines because they helped so much but yet I knew they weren't AS damaging to my liver and now he has me on Methadone for pain which at first he was totally against prescribing.
After almost a year on subs this DR has began to trust me more and I am feeling alot better with the methadone then I was when I was getting 1-2 darvocets a day.I mean that is pitiful.Might as well be a recovering drug addict.
Actually I wish I would have found out what Morphine withdrawals are compared to Darvocet withdrawals.HEHE I'm just kidding because any opiate withdrawal is bad and I love getting high.
I just get high half the month on methadones and halfd the month on morphines.


how are u recovering taking one to two pills a day of a narcotic? thats not clean and serene. at least in the IP's its not. i tryed that shit for a year and it only led me to be dry and to start using other things again. get honest with urself .....

[antony]

how are u recovering taking one to two pills a day of a narcotic? thats not clean and serene. at least in the IP's its not. i tryed that shit for a year and it only led me to be dry and to start using other things again. get honest with urself .....

knock it off with the preaching

[mikells43]

but sorry for looking at all u other people i have to concentrate on myself at this time. and u only make me feel better about me cause of what i read about u and how unmanagable i know that this shit of using has to make ur live well in my eyes cause active users fcant see the unmanagability until they allmost hit bottom. so yea god bless and thanks for the lesson in "keith get real today u dont want this life to sit aroudn all day and talk about opiates. how sick is that ? to talk about a pill all day on a fucking forum. to even have a forum about it god damn i am out ttyl".

[antony]

but sorry for looking at all u other people i have to concentrate on myself at this time. and u only make me feel better about me cause of what i read about u and how unmanagable i know that this shit of using has to make ur live well in my eyes cause active users fcant see the unmanagability until they allmost hit bottom. so yea god bless and thanks for the lesson in "keith get real today u dont want this life to sit aroudn all day and talk about opiates. how sick is that ? to talk about a pill all day on a fucking forum. to even have a forum about it god damn i am out ttyl".

cool, thanks for stopping by. hope you don't break your fucking spine when you fall off your high horse. don't want you to have to take pain killers.

[mikells43]

sorry i wasn't preaching i was getting real into reality they said i love to get high. then there not ready to recover if they love to get high. let the shit fall down more and life suck more if more dope goes in. damn. im not preaching im just saying shit that people dont wanna hear. and im out lol i dont even wanan come back. u guys are sick and make me think im well, i dont wanna use anymore well today i dont but god damn take a break. im praying for u guys

[mikells43]

see that was a sicko saying even thinking about me breaking my spine . right away you dont get that once u break ur spine u loose all feeling cause most of the time ur paralised. but NOOOOO u go right for the pain killer thing. shit dude ur neigbor just got his wisdom teeth out, the first think u think about is he not ok and doing good but what kind of killers did he get.... were only as sick as our secerets man. and anoutehr thing let the obsession go cause its one hell of an obsession.

[antony]

see that was a sicko saying even thinking about me breaking my spine . right away you dont get that once u break ur spine u loose all feeling cause most of the time ur paralised. but NOOOOO u go right for the pain killer thing. shit dude ur neigbor just got his wisdom teeth out, the first think u think about is he not ok and doing good but what kind of killers did he get.... were only as sick as our secerets man. and anoutehr thing let the obsession go cause its one hell of an obsession.

i'm not a sicko. you don't like the spine metaphor? fine

hows this?

hope your high horse doesn't kick you in the jaw.

btw, I've too been clean for a long time. so hit the bricks

[vaxn8]

keith get real today u dont want this life to sit aroudn all day and talk about opiates. how sick is that ?


Is it any sicker than Mr. Recovery reading this forum? Seriously, why the fuck would someone who is recovering read about using? Doesn't sound like your shit is together as you think it is. It's quite obvious by your language that your deep in the twelve, I'd stick with them, you're not going to find anyone agreeing with you or who wants to listen to you here!

You also have no idea why half of the people around here are taking what they're taking. Analyze your own life, hell while you're at it, write your own 4th!

[mikells43]

i di dh ave a 4th but i threw it out cause i got honest and was using the whole time now im clean . fuck the bricks i would rather hit ur mom no lol j/k i have a girlfriend i was really joking about that so dont get too mad

[orangejuice]

im just wondering. maybe somebody can help me with this fuckin ordeal im having. WHY the fuck does someone like this prick come to a forum and post irrelevant bullshit and preaches, i mean, does he get off on this shit? Talking down to people with a biased opinion. hey i gotta idea, forget the horse. Why doesnt this dude just off himself if we "bother" him so much. I mean it ruined his fucking day to hear people actually like to get high. Oh fucking well you bag of douche, go talk to someone else about your problems. GO FUCK YOURSELF faggot.

[antony]

i di dh ave a 4th but i threw it out cause i got honest and was using the whole time now im clean . fuck the bricks i would rather hit ur mom no lol j/k i have a girlfriend i was really joking about that so dont get too mad

ok

[Woods]

see that was a sicko saying even thinking about me breaking my spine . right away you dont get that once u break ur spine u loose all feeling cause most of the time ur paralised. but NOOOOO u go right for the pain killer thing. shit dude ur neigbor just got his wisdom teeth out, the first think u think about is he not ok and doing good but what kind of killers did he get.... were only as sick as our secerets man. and anoutehr thing let the obsession go cause its one hell of an obsession.

Do you know what your problem is? You spout on and on about things that you don’t understand in the least, and you talk at (not to) a group of people who are, on the whole far more intelligent and experienced with everything you’re talking about then you are.

You couldn’t handle your drugs, you were a pathetic lowlife. A worthless pustule on the rectum of drug use that gave us all a bad name. Either that or maybe you never were a user, which would make sense given how little you know about anything related to drugs.

The details don’t make a difference, an imbecile who begs only the question whether he is a failure or merely a fraud, is trying to talk to the regular members of a forum as an equal, with predictably mind numbing results.

You’re like Bill O’Reilly or Senator McCarthy, you spew as ,much garbage as you can, and quickly retreated to let people with a better understanding of the situation take over its discussion. You just set the initial tone and provide reinforcements to your cause whenever the conversation begins to turn to something the least bit rational or into an intelligent discussion, you break out the crap personal story stuff and turn everything into a drug issue

Finally, since you obviously know absolutely nothing about what you’re taking about, I would ask you to shut your useless noise hole. Just use it as God intended, shoving food down it when you’re rejected by every human being and most animals, because they can sense your desperation and pathetic ness a ile away.

[blackdog]

joined date sept
posts 15 or so
some one we better listen to dont you think?
no i dont think!

[Spell Relief]

In my experience taking Ty #3s & #4s for the every day headaches, mostly migraines;
it did at times make those headaches worse. But I cant be 100% sure since it could simplly be the course
of the injury. Im not speaking of my current condition; but back in 1980. It was hell for 2 years straight
plus when I couldnt go to that Dr. for my codiene I found out how hard it can be to get prescribed.
I found out how ugly Codiene w/ds are too...nothing has made me sick quite as that. Once in a while Id have to cop some syrup to stave off the w/ds. Goode luck!

[Spell Relief]

[CODE]
im just wondering. maybe somebody can help me with this fuckin ordeal im having. WHY the fuck does someone like this prick come to a forum and post irrelevant bullshit and preaches, i mean, does he get off on this shit? Talking down to people with a biased opinion. hey i gotta idea, forget the horse. Why doesnt this dude just off himself if we "bother" him so much. I mean it ruined his fucking day to hear people actually like to get high. Oh fucking well you bag of douche, go talk to someone else about your problems. GO FUCK YOURSELF faggot.

Ok...OJ Calm down some before a crazy talk show errupts here.
And they'll be calling Jerry Springer...Lol:rolleyes::D:p:o:) :confused:;)

[HistoryofMadness]

i think ur trying to get narcotics to feed ur addiction and ur addiction tells u that u have bad headaches and they get worse when u dont have dope to put out the fire. thats what i think cuase i was u at one point, it makes me releived that im not th only one who plays those games. come one man "what to tell the doc" holey fuck if that isn't a cry for help to help u narrrate a story to fake ur shit to get dope. ur doc dont wanna give u narcs cause he done want ot loose his ass and also cause ur young and he prob dont wanna turn u into a dope feind that will suck cock for a fix. get real with urself ur only liying to u. ur prob gonna tkae offense to this post but i dont care cause i wish someone would have said this to me when i frst started and mabey i wouldnt be here where im at today a hopeless junkie, but im clean and thats all that counts. get reall with urself ur in denyal. i can see it prob others can but u can't cause when in denyal one can't see it

holey christ lol im gonna print this shit out and take it to a 6th grade class on drug prevention day and show it ot the kids, see what opiates will make u say and do. pretty soon ull be soo hooked that ull even perform oral sex to someone to get them. god damn. im a member of the ama .... we are drug addicts.... they give a fuck abotu drug addicts, good luck cause they are gonna laugh in ur face cause they dont give a fuck. tehres people dying otu there with cancer and shit . they dont wanna feed some junkie thats gonna use up a 30 day supply in a week come on get real with urself

how are u recovering taking one to two pills a day of a narcotic? thats not clean and serene. at least in the IP's its not. i tryed that shit for a year and it only led me to be dry and to start using other things again. get honest with urself .....

but sorry for looking at all u other people i have to concentrate on myself at this time. and u only make me feel better about me cause of what i read about u and how unmanagable i know that this shit of using has to make ur live well in my eyes cause active users fcant see the unmanagability until they allmost hit bottom. so yea god bless and thanks for the lesson in "keith get real today u dont want this life to sit aroudn all day and talk about opiates. how sick is that ? to talk about a pill all day on a fucking forum. to even have a forum about it god damn i am out ttyl".

sorry i wasn't preaching i was getting real into reality they said i love to get high. then there not ready to recover if they love to get high. let the shit fall down more and life suck more if more dope goes in. damn. im not preaching im just saying shit that people dont wanna hear. and im out lol i dont even wanan come back. u guys are sick and make me think im well, i dont wanna use anymore well today i dont but god damn take a break. im praying for u guys

see that was a sicko saying even thinking about me breaking my spine . right away you dont get that once u break ur spine u loose all feeling cause most of the time ur paralised. but NOOOOO u go right for the pain killer thing. shit dude ur neigbor just got his wisdom teeth out, the first think u think about is he not ok and doing good but what kind of killers did he get.... were only as sick as our secerets man. and anoutehr thing let the obsession go cause its one hell of an obsession.

i di dh ave a 4th but i threw it out cause i got honest and was using the whole time now im clean . fuck the bricks i would rather hit ur mom no lol j/k i have a girlfriend i was really joking about that so dont get too mad

so from what I've read, you've sucked cock for drugs, and think everybody does. you're obviously white-knuckling, because you're one of the most bitter "sober" people I've seen around here in a while. that of course leads me to the thought that you're either only a few days clean, or you're institutionalized. its not hard adjusting to the world after spending time in the clink or the nuthouse, I know. but take it easy around here, because nobody wants to be 12-stepped here.


by the way, some people really do have pain issues, and some people really do scam and doctor shop. either way, neither are in nor do they want to be in recovery, so waste your time going after people at the 13th stepper's forum or something.

edit: i've read a couple of your posts, and apparently you're on opiate maintenance and addicted to benzos, so maybe you shouldn't be handing out advice on recovery until you've got a better handle on it?

[WarmCyanide]

I was trying to find where Bi11i posted the rules for this site. they are numbered. Where is it?
Mikells43 might find it helpful. one of the things you need to realize that this is not a recovery/12 step
board. If you dont like people on here "Philing opiates", go elsewhere on the vast expanse of the internet, or go ride an old squeaky bicycle. I remember something to the effect of not condoning or endorsing programs. another
stipulation is not acting like an asshole to each other. I'm sure 99% of us in here are adults and should
act accordingly. Now if you don't mind, I hear the icecream man outside.:finger4u:

[dolofina]

I was trying to find where Bi11i posted the rules for this site. they are numbered. Where is it?
.:finger4u:
Here it is:
http://forum.opiophile.org/showthread.php?p=146
(The Forum Rules)
(Excerpt:
Opiophile.org Rules
Opiophile.org is here for the opiated. We're not a recovery board, but an information exchange designed and developed to promote opioid research, awareness, and harm reduction. In light of that, we're not here to 12-step anyone. This also means that in turn, we'd rather not be 12-stepped ourselves. (Opiophile.org does not condone nor do we denounce the 12-Step philosophy.)

[orangejuice]

I was trying to find where Bi11i posted the rules for this site. they are numbered. Where is it?
Mikells43 might find it helpful.

LMAO it took me a min to get this. funny shat.

[vanilla_mlkshake2007]

how are u recovering taking one to two pills a day of a narcotic? thats not clean and serene. at least in the IP's its not. i tryed that shit for a year and it only led me to be dry and to start using other things again. get honest with urself .....



I don't think I ever said I expected to be totally clean and serene that would be totally unrealistic for someone who has been using one drug or another for 25 years.I'm just saying its a start,and its a hell of alot better then using 720 milligrams of morphine a day plus 168 dilaudids in a week or two on top of that.I think I am doing alot better,then I was.
I don't think I ever expect to be totally narcotic free (from morphine) unless I try really hard like I am doing and get on a higher dose of methadone then 30 milligrams a day.
Who wants to be straight 24/7 7 days a week anyways Not me I want to get high.I just don't want it to be as much as I am doing now and as much money as I am spending?
I wish it was possible for me but I honestly don't think I can remain drug free forever now that I have got a taste of that great warm feeling .At least I am trying are you?

[vanilla_mlkshake2007]

I was trying to find where Bi11i posted the rules for this site. they are numbered. Where is it?
Mikells43 might find it helpful. one of the things you need to realize that this is not a recovery/12 step
board. If you dont like people on here "Philing opiates", go elsewhere on the vast expanse of the internet, or go ride an old squeaky bicycle. I remember something to the effect of not condoning or endorsing programs. another
stipulation is not acting like an asshole to each other. I'm sure 99% of us in here are adults and should
act accordingly. Now if you don't mind, I hear the icecream man outside.:finger4u:

At least I am not the only one who finds him holier then thou attitude sickening. Mikells43 can take his 12-step shit up the ass, and stop saying how someone like me who has changed incredibly since the methadone will re-act.
I mean shit I only got put on 30 milligrams of methadone is that even gonna compare to all the morphine I was doing?Hell No but at least I know instead of the last 3 weeks thinking about suicide as the only way out I now know methadone is the answer for me when I do decide to completely stop if I do.
If I don't that is my own business but he doesn't know how I have been so hopelkess feeling thinking subs was my only option,becvause subs work for some it doesn't mean it will work for me and it didn't I tried it,Thats why I felt like I had gotten myself into something with no way out.Only now I know there is a better answer for me personally(methadone) and if that is the only thing that keeps me from wanting to kill myself when I have kids that need me,then I will take this small glimmer of hope.

[antony]

easy vanilla...you're a little late on this one, this guy got booted I heard.

good job on cutting down though. can't imagine how hard its been.

[chemboy7]

They booted that asshole that supposedly tried leading members to a hacker site on his first post too didn't they? I tried to find that thread like the day after it came out to see what happened with it and it seems to be deleted.

[antony]

They booted that asshole that supposedly tried leading members to a hacker site on his first post too didn't they? I tried to find that thread like the day after it came out to see what happened with it and it seems to be deleted.

huh? someone tried to pull a fast one on us brainiacs into his lemmingesque pit of hacking? explain.

[chemboy7]

I'm pretty sure it was sometime last week, it could have been sooner though, dunno. The title to the thread was something weird like "%*$&^^http.///whatever" and there may have been a site name in the title or post, don't really remember. I was lost, didn't know what he was getting at, but someone wrote a reply to it to the effect that he was trying to lead members to a hacker site and should be booted. I Went back the next day to check up on it and try to figure out WTF was going on with it and it was gone. Just assumed he was malignate and was cut off.

[vanilla_mlkshake2007]

They booted that asshole that supposedly tried leading members to a hacker site on his first post too didn't they? I tried to find that thread like the day after it came out to see what happened with it and it seems to be deleted.


I just went to the members list and it says his last activity was`5 days ago but I hope you guys are` right and he'sa gone.I just read`his posts and was shocked at his attitude towards us.

[vanilla_mlkshake2007]

Oh and thanksa for the support.I don't know I'm trying but I also don't plan on quitting cold turkey, but I was so fed up with this life the pastr few weeks that I actually tried twice to end it all peacefully and then I thought about how selfish I was being towards my children.
I am not looking for any pity either I am just being honest but now that I have discovered methadone,I am hopeful that this will be a great option for me.I know` I have played and therefore have to pay so I am not expecting this to be` easy even w/ methadone but at least I have a fighting chance when I'm ready and only when I am ready.

[vaxn8]

Oh and thanksa for the support.I don't know I'm trying but I also don't plan on quitting cold turkey, but I was so fed up with this life the pastr few weeks that I actually tried twice to end it all peacefully and then I thought about how selfish I was being towards my children.


Vanilla- when you get to feeling like that, you gotta talk to someone that understands your situation. Trying to solve shit like that on your own isn't going to have a happy ending. Get on here, let us talk to you - or talk to someone who lives close to you. Whatever you do just let people know when you are thinking that way. I dont' know how common it is, but I know you aren't the only one who feels like that at times!