Excuses

[Opiyum]

This thread is dedicated to those, like me, who sometimes come to a point were we must go to work in a state of withdrawal. As I've said before Im a chef and this is a very physical job so when I am in a state of mild withdrawal it shows. Even though sometimes I think they know whats up with me I'm pretty sure most employers dont. Obviously Im not talking about a full blown kick here Im just about talking achey, sneezy, yawning, watery eye, giant weight pushing down, goosebumbs, clumsy, feelings. Like that Nyquil(sp) commercial or the seven dwarves.
So with that established what I want to happen here is for those that can empathize with this situation to put our heads together and come up with good reasonable excuses for why we aren't in such a great mood and why we aren't getting as much done as we normally do.
"I'm feeling sick" or "Just got a lot on my mind" are ok but we are smarter than this and its good to have a list of reasons because afterall it is a recurring obstacle we must overcome in our lives. Is it not?
Its nice to be prepared instead of having to think of something on the spot too.

Lastly I realize this is kind of a "Shady" post because it is encouraging us philes to lie, but unfortunately this is a reality we must all deal with.
Other than my suprise today I haven't used for over a week and a half so at the moment I dont need any excuses but as the boy scouts say. "Always be prepared"

Chances are this thread will be usefull or be ignored...I prefer to be a productive person so hopefully its the former.

Thanks in advance guys and guyettes:)

[Scarlettnight]

Going to work while being off of Opiates is the worst, let's face it you don't wanna be ther no matter how much you love your job. I remember MANY nights at the hospital where I just wasn't the employee I usually was. What are you going to do tell them " I am currently out of drugs and going through withdrawl." Hell no you say you aren't feeling well or some other lame excuse so they will get up off ya. I find in these situations that Ephedrine helps greatly. At least it gives me that false energy that I need to deal with what I have to deal with.

[Opiyum]

Going to work while being off of Opiates is the worst, let's face it you don't wanna be ther no matter how much you love your job. I remember MANY nights at the hospital where I just wasn't the employee I usually was. What are you going to do tell them " I am currently out of drugs and going through withdrawl." Hell no you say you aren't feeling well or some other lame excuse so they will get up off ya. I find in these situations that Ephedrine helps greatly. At least it gives me that false energy that I need to deal with what I have to deal with.

I feel for ya and Im sure everyone else here does too. Especially working in a hospital were there are people laying in beds nodding out on morphine in front of you.
This is yet another great Example/Reason why collectively we should try and come up with some good things to say to our supervisors. Something that will make them leave us alone for the rest of the day. Something that they would say " oh well Im sorry to hear that I hope things turn out ok." Maybe they'll even go easy on you/us for a couple days.

If people can Rob Banks then we can come up with excuses for our lethargic ways.

Thanks for the reply Scarlett

[Scarlettnight]

You could tell them you had PMS ( it works) but seeing as how you are a guy I don't think they would buy it. Tell them your Bursitis is flaring up. That one works too.

[ZodiacKiller]

Going to work while being off of Opiates is the worst, let's face it you don't wanna be ther no matter how much you love your job. I remember MANY nights at the hospital where I just wasn't the employee I usually was. What are you going to do tell them " I am currently out of drugs and going through withdrawl." Hell no you say you aren't feeling well or some other lame excuse so they will get up off ya. I find in these situations that Ephedrine helps greatly. At least it gives me that false energy that I need to deal with what I have to deal with.

I also can extoll the virtues of ephedrine for work while in WD. I get those "Stacker 3" capsules from the gas station, and they are like a huge kick in the ass. Definitely helps for the lethargy that always is a part of WD for me. As a matter of fact, I don't even think they have actual ephedrine in 'em anymore, but they sure do work.

[Scarlettnight]

To my knowledge ZK they do not have Ephedrine in them. However where I live at least they still sell Ephedrine although now they have thrown in 200 mg of Guaifenesin. This hasn't bothered me in the least. They sell them at gas stations so really easy to obtain and that makes me very happy.

[antony]

i used to work in the pits (trading) and there was at least 10,000 flourescent lights, you have to scream, fight with people, run like crazy. thats the worst. but....sitting at home, with nothing on your mind but getting more shit will make you worse. i just look at as if you go out drinking, youre gonna pay, if your gonna veg for a couple weeks straight, all fucked off, feeling good, youre gonna pay.



plus the last place i worked, i was running shit for people, when i was sick, rarely getting a freebee:mad:

[Coddfish]

"my dog died." But people can't know you very well or that could be a little iffy. You'd have to dedoghair yourself everytime you went to work. Or, how many grandmas can you have? I had four at one point. Knock them off once in a while. Maybe a highschool friend called up and is being beaten by her husband and you are trying to figure out how to help her. Or an aunt is ill, might not make it. Hell, that's off the top of my head.

[antony]

i've always used "would you do me a favor, and shut the fuck up?" then, when your feeling better, you buy the coworker lunch, and everything is okay.

"sorry for that, i wasn't feeling well and you can be a real ballbuster."

[Phluck]

I also can extoll the virtues of ephedrine for work while in WD. I get those "Stacker 3" capsules from the gas station, and they are like a huge kick in the ass. Definitely helps for the lethargy that always is a part of WD for me. As a matter of fact, I don't even think they have actual ephedrine in 'em anymore, but they sure do work.

Ugh... any stimulants while WDing make me feel like absolute shit. I guess "I've got a nasty cold" would work, but depending how often you're having to go through this (and if you're working with food, people might not approve of having someone "contagious" around)... I guess maybe you could do some research on various disorders, maybe there's something genetic that causes fatigue that you could blame.

[chemboy7]

Tell them that you think you may have came down with that bird flu everyone is going so apeshit over. That way not only will you being sick and teary be acceptable, but they will want to stay the fuck away from you and leave you the peace you so sorely deserve. :D

[Opiyum]

You could tell them you had PMS ( it works) but seeing as how you are a guy I don't think they would buy it. Tell them your Bursitis is flaring up. That one works too. If only I was a girl.

Tell them that you think you may have came down with that bird flu everyone is going so apeshit over. That way not only will you being sick and teary be acceptable, but they will want to stay the fuck away from you and leave you the peace you so sorely deserve

Wont I have to die eventually? Thats not to big a price to pay when it comes to being left the fuck alone. Fuck I guess Im just delaying the inevitable....now wheres that Glock.

my dog died." But people can't know you very well or that could be a little iffy. You'd have to dedoghair yourself everytime you went to work. Or, how many grandmas can you have? I had four at one point. Knock them off once in a while. Maybe a highschool friend called up and is being beaten by her husband and you are trying to figure out how to help her. Or an aunt is ill, might not make it. Hell, that's off the top of my head. I knew the grandma one would come up...Mine are also dead four or five times over and two are really dead...

Ugh... any stimulants while WDing make me feel like absolute shit.
Agreed.

and if you're working with food, people might not approve of having someone "contagious" around).
You wouldnt believe the conditions owners will let you work under...actually replace let with force.


Well fuck I cant think of any good ones other than the obvious ones either(no disrespect). I guess thats how it goes.
So far becoming a woman looks like the best option.

[Scarlettnight]

Hey, Bursitis works well and they cannot tell if you actually have a flare up. Just hold your shoulder or hip.

[Opiyum]

Hey, Bursitis works well and they cannot tell if you actually have a flare up. Just hold your shoulder or hip.

I missed that one...Bursitis. The difficult part will be keeping a straight face. It just sounds funny. Of course I wont be in a good mood if I am telling my boss my Bursitis is flaring up.

Thanks agane

[Coddfish]

Yeah, what's the deal with stimulants in wd's!?? That is the WORST thing I could do. Tried crank, coke, ephedrine, and ex. All because people told me those things would help. Trrible idea, for me anyways. Partly cause of the heart-exiting-chest feeling that goes with wds. Avoid coffee, tea, acetaminophen, cold medicine, anything that even sounds like it might stimulate.

[Scarlettnight]

Again everyone is different. For me they are descended from the gods. The only ill affects I get are trembling hands and all jacked up. Did I mention I haven't done coke or crystal since the late 90's? Like back in 99 when I worked in a "Club." So for me ephedrine is a must in withdrawl.

[ZodiacKiller]

Ugh... any stimulants while WDing make me feel like absolute shit. I guess "I've got a nasty cold" would work, but depending how often you're having to go through this (and if you're working with food, people might not approve of having someone "contagious" around)... I guess maybe you could do some research on various disorders, maybe there's something genetic that causes fatigue that you could blame.

I totally agree with you about stimulants being horrible while in WD, however, when you have a somewhat physical job like mine, and you MUST be there busting ass, a little 'Stacker 3' boost helps me get my work done.

And I only do that if I've go the WD tamed with Suboxone or Tramadol. If I was in full-on foaming/puking/fever/shiting withdrawal, there's no way I could even get to the job site, much less haul my fat ass up a ladder and do any work.

Sorry if I mislead anyone into think I actually would enjoy stimulants while in WD. They just help me get the work done, so I can get paid and buy more smack...;)

ZK

[Opiyum]

We opiophiles are an easily distractable bunch huh? DOnt yell at me Im guilty too. What the hell were we talking about to begin with...something about telling the boss to fuck off...man I've done five things today..

1 smoked cigs in the sun
2 played drums
3 Ate food
4 got some pills and weed
5 sat in front of this fucking machine

Now I shall make it six and sleep....

[devilsdrug]

ok opi is this like group therapy with role playin ,,, can i be the supervisor

[Opiyum]

Good to see ya back dev. Hope everything went well with your father.



Okay so here's one I just remembered upon waking this morning:

Employee calls up work and says "I cant make it in today Im really sick."

"Well how sick are you, I need ya in here today." asks his boss

"I'm Fuckin' my sister how sick is that!?"

If you work for any kind of corporate entity than I wouldn't recommend using that one.hehehe

Zucchinni whench here I come.

[malefiacrum]

I usally go to work, and let the withdrawal kick in....within an hour of being there, half the company is like, "You look like hell bud, you should go home", and I respond, "No, I got a lot to do" (Wanna sound like a trooper) and then 30 minutes to 1/2 hour later I go, "You know what, I think I am going to head home, I am actually feeling worse"
For me I do IT stuff, and with RDP and 'logmein.com' I can pretty much do a lot of what needs to be done at home...I cannot stand being at work when I am sick...then again, I make sure that RARELY ever happens, hehe

[malefiacrum]

30 minutes to a 1/2 an hour
Last time I checked they were the same thing, lol


...sometimes I even don't take my moring dose just so I do get sick and can take the day off, head home, and dose up, hahhaha
How's that! I am USING the WDs to MY advantage...

[insanesteveo]

i've always used "would you do me a favor, and shut the fuck up?" then, when your feeling better, you buy the coworker lunch, and everything is okay.

"sorry for that, i wasn't feeling well and you can be a real ballbuster."
that, is hilarious. i believe ive yelled that at some people at work before. or been told that by my roomates.

You wouldnt believe the conditions owners will let you work under...actually replace let with force.
yea, i also work in a kitchen and i have literally had snot coming out my nose so fast that it was almost dripping into the 80 pound ball of dough i was cutting apart. not to mention coughing, sneezing, and hacking phlegm up.

Last time I checked they were the same thing, lol


...sometimes I even don't take my moring dose just so I do get sick and can take the day off, head home, and dose up, hahhaha
How's that! I am USING the WDs to MY advantage...
way to catch yourself. its not wrong if you correct it yourself.


............now i must confess i dont think i have ever had wd's. im sure ive had some minor symptoms, but never enough that i chalk it up to wd's, and i always cover those feeling with pot and figure im sick. lasts a day or two at the most. now that i think of it, i dont think ive been plain sick for longer than maybe 4 days.

[reddragon3668]

yea, i also work in a kitchen and i have literally had snot coming out my nose so fast that it was almost dripping into the 80 pound ball of dough i was cutting apart. not to mention coughing, sneezing, and hacking phlegm up.
Okay, I don't think I am going to be eatting out any time soon....


You can always say that you are sick to your stomach... you ate something that hasn't set well with your stomach... add to that several long, very long trips to the bathroom... catch some shut eye while sitting there...:uhhohh: Also, saying you were up all night before puking or with the shits works well too. That one would prolly be better if you work in the morning.

[shaunclo]

What I use to do is try to plan it out. If you know you gonna be out and the w/d's are coming, call the night beofre you have to go to work and let them know that, "I just wanted to check in and say that I am really starting to get ill, I cant keep anything down and am not even sure if I will be able to call tomorrow." Then call the next morning and say, "Im sooo sorry but I just cant make it."

This way it doesnt seem so spur of the moment, it seems more sincere, like you were thinking of them before the work day even started. It works well, trust me. They think you really care and are dedicated. I think all junkys would be great managers, cause they know every fuckin excuse in the universe.

[ZodiacKiller]

My problem is that I own the business, and right now I got 3 guys working for me.

So what the fuck do I tell them? They all get high, and at least one of 'em has been a friend for ages, and he know what I do in my spare time. So I just tell em: "Listen fuckers, I'm stayin' home today 'cause I'm in withdrawal, and you better get ______amount of work done, or when I come back in tomorrow, I'm gonna tear you all a new asshole!". They're pretty good guys, and they know what they're doing, but they're always busting my chops about what drugs I use. Even though they smoke weed all day and pound back line after line of cocaine.

The hard part is talking to my customers when in WD, or even worse, trying to sell a job. I got's mad sales skills, but when I'm WDing, I just don't feel on top of my game.....

ZK

[HistoryofMadness]

yea, i also work in a kitchen and i have literally had snot coming out my nose so fast that it was almost dripping into the 80 pound ball of dough i was cutting apart. not to mention coughing, sneezing, and hacking phlegm up.



I laughed pretty hard at that one, having been in a kitchen in prior years.

i've always used "would you do me a favor, and shut the fuck up?" then, when your feeling better, you buy the coworker lunch, and everything is okay.

"sorry for that, i wasn't feeling well and you can be a real ballbuster."


What if this is the way you usually are at work? I guess I couldn't do it.


Here are mine:
1. I ate some bad catfish last night (guaranteed no one wants to hear anymore).
2. About 2 hours into the day, go into the bathroom with a can of vegetable soup in your pocket. Wait until you are sure someone you work with can hear you. Then you make the sickening vomit sound, dump almost all the soup in the toilet (for sound effects) and then flush. Here's the kicker: After flushing pour the remainder of the soup in the toilet and leave it. Again, no questions asked.
3. Call in sick. If you're all out of sick days, call in dead.

-H

[antony]

It isn't that im a all around jag off, but my co-workers know that my temper is usually a just a warning, that if were to keep it up, someone's going home early. but im usually a nice guy to them, and when you apologize like so, they know where the line's drawn.

[HistoryofMadness]

It isn't that im a all around jag off, but my co-workers know that my temper is usually a just a warning, that if were to keep it up, someone's going home early. but im usually a nice guy to them, and when you apologize like so, they know where the line's drawn.

I hear ya. I just meant that I'm always an asshole at work. In a joking manner of course. But I don't have quite the skill of Devilsdrug. Ah, to have high hopes and aspirations of becoming the ultimate asshole. :D

-H

[devilsdrug]

such a nice compliment, you deserve pts for that it took years of practice , well im my own boss and mostly work alone because i also expect a high quality of work , but back in the day sick at work with a 45 min lunch , 20 min 1 way to the connect ah fuk it late back from lunch , shittin like a garden hose stain thy pants (good thing i wore a lab coat) ha , damn air conditioning would play hell with nose , other places id just drink at work not at this place tho , its like ive been saying a lot if i only knew then what i know now, nowadays i have so much backup , backup for the backup if i run low in the old days i didnt look that far ahead, and just went to work sick fukkim send me home i want the pay

[Kallie]

such a nice compliment, you deserve pts for that it took years of practice , well im my own boss and mostly work alone because i also expect a high quality of work , but back in the day sick at work with a 45 min lunch , 20 min 1 way to the connect ah fuk it late back from lunch , shittin like a garden hose stain thy pants (good thing i wore a lab coat) ha , damn air conditioning would play hell with nose , other places id just drink at work not at this place tho , its like ive been saying a lot if i only knew then what i know now, nowadays i have so much backup , backup for the backup if i run low in the old days i didnt look that far ahead, and just went to work sick fukkim send me home i want the pay

Hi DD, and again I still hoping you and your family are holding up okay. I missed you.

And I see, you certainly haven't lost you sense of humor! Lots here... some pretttttty sick, but all good. That veggie soup is classic. Have to store that wonderful tidbit away for some future use....

I have no bursitis, but I use to love telling ppl I had it... just liked saying the words "Ughhh, my bursitis if flaring up." I was in HS.

Opi, you have had a very productive day... I'd like to have one like that, too.

And finally, when I use to work for an airline, and felt HORRIBLE coming back on a loooong-ass trans-atlantic flight, if I had a "complicit, and also in agony" co-worker...... and first class was almost empty.... we'd take turns hiding under a blanket in the last row of 1st, snoozing.......just a big navy lump..........ahhh, the magic power nap.

[antony]

what the fuck is bursitis? i think if i was to tell anyone i had that, tthey'd laugh and tell me to get to work. this is the first place i've heard of it.

[slugbone]

what's been working for me for a long time is saying i have allergies and brining in one of those nose sprayer things. if they ask what kind i say pollen, dust, anything and they have all bought into it. the lie can become as elaborate as you need it to -

some of my coworkers said they thought i did a lot of coke cause i was coming in with a runny nose and feeling like shit - i told them i would have to take shots for the allergies etc...one drug i've never done ironically enough was coke even though they thought i was a cokehead.