Methadone Personality Changes

[SynthMorph]

Was on methadone for a bit and its been more than 3 months since kicking it. Remember not giving a shit about anything and being moody and just enjoying my methadone nodding sessions everyday. I'm slowing starting to care about regular things again like friends, life etc. Maybe it has something to do with methadone being a NMDA receptor antagonist like ketamine that causes these changes? I even remember one time I was in a half awake state hallucinating a human/ghost figure, powerful stuff. Its hard to see the changes from within because they come on slow and methadone seems to fuck people up quite a bit over time. When I was on morphine nothing even remotely close to these type of changes took place, and I can tell I'm still not 100% like before I started taking this crap. Remember watching a documentary about a guy on methadone and his friendships broke apart when he got on it and they came back when he got off it. That's the kind of changes I got, losing touch with friends and just not caring and acting sorta weird I guess, like being on low dose ketamine almost. Feel so shitty now because I feel like I lost 2 years to this bullshit and didn't realize how bad or didn't even care about these side effects, biggest mistake of my life. I wasn't aware methadone was the most devasting opiate to the personality and felt trapped because it's the only legal option and didn't wanna keep up the expensive, consuming, junky lifestyle but now see its healthier than the done. I've also read its 3-10x more toxic than morphine with more side effects. The more I read about it the more I can't believe this shit is prescribed so readily, it pisses me off. They should be offering slow release morphine. No other opiate seems to do this to me. Anyone else experience methadone personality changes? Sorry about the long rant/post had to get it out there.

[Inspektahdek]

I kind of have what you're going through but I sort of like it, I guess I might be a bit more moody but I enjoy just about anything and I'm much more happy and outgoing while on it for sure.

That hallucination and such is because the nodding from the done because done is one of the opiates that is strong in repiratory depression, it slows your heartrate and blood pressure down, but I have anxiety so for me its a savior. :)

[nick]

I don't think this is just 'done.I think it's just a heavy habit and of course 'done is a heavy habit.

Hell,I was just like this on diamorphine.

[Seedy]

^^ man i'm often just like that on the seeds - after too long on a lucky streak.

[Narkotikon]

Yes, with morphine, oxy, and even H, I have energy, am able to function, am generally chipper, etc. On MMT, I gained 70lbs. because I was eating a ton of ice cream and chocolate everyday (trying to self-medicate with sugar and high-fat foods, I guess), and I swear I didn't clean my apartment for the entire 10 months I was on the stuff, and this is coming from someone with OCD who used to take two baths a day, wash his hands compulsively, and clean his apartment from top to bottom at least once a week. I just was drained, emotionally and physically on methadone. It took all my energy just to take a bath. I didn't like the stuff. I still believe in MMT for extreme cases, but I wouldn't want to be on it again. Thank god people have the option of bupe / subs now. But yes, I think the US should be more progressive like Europe in terms of it's attitude toward maintenance. I think slow-release morphine, heroin, or hydromorphone would be excellent options for some people. I mean, not everyone responds to every drug. While methadone may be great for some, it might be the worst thing for others. Nothing is objective about this.

[jonny-5]

Yes, with morphine, oxy, and even H, I have energy, am able to function, am generally chipper, etc. On MMT, I gained 70lbs. because I was eating a ton of ice cream and chocolate everyday (trying to self-medicate with sugar and high-fat foods, I guess), and I swear I didn't clean my apartment for the entire 10 months I was on the stuff, and this is coming from someone with OCD who used to take two baths a day, wash his hands compulsively, and clean his apartment from top to bottom at least once a week. I just was drained, emotionally and physically on methadone. It took all my energy just to take a bath. I didn't like the stuff. I still believe in MMT for extreme cases, but I wouldn't want to be on it again. Thank god people have the option of bupe / subs now. But yes, I think the US should be more progressive like Europe in terms of it's attitude toward maintenance. I think slow-release morphine, heroin, or hydromorphone would be excellent options for some people. I mean, not everyone responds to every drug. While methadone may be great for some, it might be the worst thing for others. Nothing is objective about this.


wouldnt it be nice to go to the doctor once a month and come home with 30 days worth of heroin for HMT? thatll be the day....plus when you run out early you could get some from the street and not piss "dirty."

[nick]

wouldnt it be nice to go to the doctor once a month and come home with 30 days worth of heroin for HMT? thatll be the day....plus when you run out early you could get some from the street and not piss "dirty."

I actually once got a multiple week script due to my going on holiday in the wilds of Wales.I think it was 26 days worth.After a picked up my amps,I emptied them on my bed and man.................what beauty.

Oh and they didn't really bother with urine testing me.I think I went over a decade without giving a sample.


"Happy" days.

[Inspektahdek]

I don't think this is just 'done.I think it's just a heavy habit and of course 'done is a heavy habit.

Hell,I was just like this on diamorphine.



ah' yes, nick ol' chap! You and your lucky diamorphine RX in the past, I envy you sir.



I actually once got a multiple week script due to my going on holiday in the wilds of Wales.I think it was 26 days worth.After a picked up my amps,I emptied them on my bed and man.................what beauty.

Oh and they didn't really bother with urine testing me.I think I went over a decade without giving a sample.


"Happy" days.



OH DEAR GOD! I am now officially extremely jealous! I would have taken pictures all over the place, before and after photos, just a whole folder dedicated to a spread of using legal diamorphine 100% uncut. Did you make any photos perhaps? I bet they were some happy days! Plus for those "take homes"! WOW, that gives a whole new meaning to "take-home's" :D


26 days worth? How many amps were you getting for a days' use? Two, three maybe? Or just one for chips sake?



But yes, I think the US should be more progressive like Europe in terms of it's attitude toward maintenance. I think slow-release morphine, heroin, or hydromorphone would be excellent options for some people. I mean, not everyone responds to every drug. While methadone may be great for some, it might be the worst thing for others. Nothing is objective about this.


I think it's more the UK with the leniency, well atleast moreso than central Europe in the opiate area, Nederlanders like Saint that's a different story but I agree with your idea with slow release H, HM, etc. I like my done though, but I'd be entirely up for trying other and newer slow release meds if they were ever released like time-release hydromorph, scag, etc. Prob have to plug the scag though because I think oral or PO H is shite, right?

[nick]

ah' yes, nick ol' chap! You and your lucky diamorphine RX in the past, I envy you sir.







OH DEAR GOD! I am now officially extremely jealous! I would have taken pictures all over the place, before and after photos, just a whole folder dedicated to a spread of using legal diamorphine 100% uncut. Did you make any photos perhaps? I bet they were some happy days! Plus for those "take homes"! WOW, that gives a whole new meaning to "take-home's" :D


26 days worth? How many amps were you getting for a days' use? Two, three maybe? Or just one for chips sake?

I was getting 5x30mgs amps at the time.

Sadly I didn't take any photos.When you have the real thing.......you don't need drug porn.

[Narkotikon]

Prob have to plug the scag though because I think oral or PO H is shite, right?

Yeah, the time-release would only work for the morphine or hydromorphone, because heroin taken PO is just metabolized into morphine. I imagine if they ever would do that (not that the US would in any near foreseable future) that you'd have to get amps like Nick said, and probably have to go multiple times to a clinic each day to shoot / be injected by a nurse, then after you've been there for a while you'd be eligible for take homes. That's how I imagine it would work anyway. Personally, I'd rather have the time released hydromorphone, then the morphine, then the H. I think being prescribed a pill would be better than making daily (or multiple daily) trips to a clinic. I hated going every morning. It would nicer if you could just wake up and dose at home, like with Subs.

[Inspektahdek]

I was getting 5x30mgs amps at the time.

Sadly I didn't take any photos.When you have the real thing.......you don't need drug porn.


That's understandable and all but I mean, just as a memory, like having a birth photo of your child or something, lol. My priorities would have prob led the same Nick. 5 30mg amps huh? Hmm, OK we know they're guaranteed 100% pure, was each amp equivalent to a 100mg/.1g bag or how did it equate on UK standards?

[nick]

That's understandable and all but I mean, just as a memory, like having a birth photo of your child or something, lol. My priorities would have prob led the same Nick. 5 30mg amps huh? Hmm, OK we know they're guaranteed 100% pure, was each amp equivalent to a 100mg/.1g bag or how did it equate on UK standards?

A 30mg amp is kinda like a £10 bag,but the amps are a better hit and the bags last longer.