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View Full Version : HELP: need advice on legal matter!


RxQueen
07-25-2007, 11:44 PM
as some of you might remember, i recently posted about how i had to have my ex-bf arrested for assault. i'm still moving to my mom's place, but it'll be another week or two until they can take me in permanently. in the meantime, the ex has been staying elsewhere so that i can pack up the rest of my stuff from this house that we had shared.

i saw him this past monday at the preliminary hearing. he had his whole family there (mom, dad, sister, & brother-in-law), and they all spent their time glaring at me, full of hatred. his dad hired him the best, most expensive lawyer in the county (the one that has all the judges in his back pocket). this lawyer got the simple assault charge dropped, and let the court fine the ex for harassment. (and i saw his dad whip out his checkbook to pay it for him on my way out). my ex's lawyer asked me after the hearing if i minded the constable bringing the ex over to the house, to get more clothing and his "essentials." i said fine, as long as the constable was there.

so that afternoon, the ex showed up with his brother-in-law (& the constable), and they proceeded to empty as much as they could of every drawer & cabinet in the house into boxes. they filled up the whole back of an SUV, and started filling a car with all of the ex's belongings. after about 25-30 minutes of this (and seeing that they were carrying out boxes of candles, CD's, posters, and assorted crap, in other words, NON-essentials), i asked the constable why he was taking everything he owned rather than what i was told. the constable had to tell him 3times to wrap up this process since the court had only told him to remove his "essentials" from the premises. the ex claimed that his lawyer had told him to get everything out that he could, but the constable made him leave because he had been told just to escort the ex to get his necessities.

i wondered why the ex thought that he had to take all he could from here. surely he knows that i'm not the type to trash his stuff! well today's mail brought the answer to my question, and sends me here to ask you all if anyone here knows if i have any legal recourse to protect my privacy. here's what happened.

in today's mail, i received a large manila envelope. it was from my ex's sister. inside it were pages photocopied from one of my old journals, containing VERY incriminating things written during my last run on IV'd speed (about my suicidal depression, fights i'd had with the ex, and semi-coherent ramblings as i complained to myself about my damaged veins, etc). attached to the photocopies is a hand-written page from her, stating that "the remaining 50 plus pages of your nauseating psychotic 'diary' is in a safe deposit box." she proceeds to write that i am a "sick, deranged, psychotic who gains pleasure in torturing others." she also claims to have in this safe deposit box "tapes of (me) threatening to kill him." (<-- this part MUST be a lie, or else he must've secretly been recording a heated argument when either of us was likely to wish the other dead, or wish we had the means to kill the other). she concludes her letter with "try this shit one more time you sick junkie and its you who will go to jail. good luck trying to support yourself LOSER. we all hate you. you're(sic) sugar daddy is gone. FUCK OFF"

once i had read through this harassing threat package, i checked my boxes of stuff. the journal that the pages were photocopied from is in my possession (and as far as i checked, intact). this means that the ex must've stolen it BEFORE the night the assault happened, made his copies, and returned it without my knowledge. now it's apparent to me that he has circulated it to his whole family (that's why they looked like they were shooting knives out of their eyes at me at the hearing). for his sister to be holding copies of my personal writings hostage in a safe deposit box is sickening. the level of rage and vengefulness in her letter makes me think that she's planning to use it against me in the future (send it to future employers, members of my family, etc).

if i thought that the sister had an ounce of maturity (or if i had ANY reason at all to trust her), i would laugh this off. it is sooo far past ridiculous. as far as they're concerned, what she's holding is an experiment i did in creative writing, and is completely fictional. perhaps i might look into getting it published someday. it is MY intellectual property. here's the part where i could use advice from anyone who might know anything about the law in this area.

would i stand any chance if i demanded that my writings be returned to me? i don't want anyone having copies of that stuff, especially one so bent on revenge on me for forcing her brother to face the consequences of his own actions. my notebook was stolen, photocopied and returned without my knowledge or consent. i consider this alone a violation of my privacy, and i fear that it will be used against me in the future. was it an illegal act in the eyes of a court? if she does in fact have any tapes of me saying that i wish i had the means to off her brother, would the recording be in violation of any law? (since i was never informed i was being recorded). and most importantly.... since the family can afford the very best lawyer, do i stand any chance of having a judge rule in my favor, even if i am the one acting in a fully above-the-board legal manner?

this is such an embarassing situation. i KNOW better than to put anything incriminating in writing! i'm a dumb shit for ever having used my personal journal as therapy for myself in working out my perrsonal problems. but i was high out of my damn mind at the time, and doing every drug i could get ahold of. i should've destroyed the notebook after i got off that run, but i kept it to look through.... it was good for me to remember how bad i got that winter, when i was thinking about going back to that shit. now it is possibly going to be the thing that gets used as evidence against me, to ruin my future. what should i do??? i'm going nuts thinking of the things that bitch could do to me with those pages in her hands.

Curio
07-25-2007, 11:57 PM
wow....I totally relate to your problem...can't comment here due to my personal legal troubles, and wanting to remain anonymous...

please pm me an email address or something if you want to trade war stories...unfortunately, I have no answers for you, only my sincere empathy as I can totally relate...

EleusisII
08-11-2007, 10:04 PM
If you have copyright on it, I imagine you could go to court to get it back.
I don't know the exact rules in the US, but where I'm from you get copyright on something, basically by writing (c) A. Douchebag on it. I imagine that it's the same in the US.

There might be some other legal options here, blackmail comes to mind. Hell, maybe you could sue her for monetary damages because of emotional distress. Find a lawyer hun!

Black_Pony
08-11-2007, 10:30 PM
Wow! The fact that he took your 'personal journal' and made copies of it is such a MASSIVE violation of trust, so vile and disgusting, that it is making me physically sick to my stomach. :mad:

Unfortunately, the damage is done. I mean even if you could subpoena somehow to get the photocopies back from her, who's to say she hasn't run off a dozen more by now (God forbid!)?

Sorry for wasting bandwidth as I'm not a legal professional, I can't help, but I do empathize. Hopefully if we keep bumping it someone will read this thread who can help. But, I haven't run into any lawyers on this forum lately. Anyone who is would be a HUGE asset to this community.

I hope an AIDS patient bleeds into your ex's breakfast cereal tomorrow morning when he's not looking. He deserves to die.

flipside
08-12-2007, 11:40 AM
(Oh sweetie, this sucks..please get in touch. I know a ffriendly lawyer who could give you some free advice. and def Pm curio..and curio..you get in touch please, worried about you too.

RxQueen
08-12-2007, 06:17 PM
thanks for the replies! and yes, the situation is SICKENING! but at least now i'm moved into my mom's house, safely away from the asshole. i haven't heard anything else from him or his family about the journals, but then again, the day after i made the original post here, i had the local cops call the ex's sister to let her know that any further contact she might make with me would be viewed as harassment and prosecuted as such. but it still bothers me to know that she has copies, and like blackpony said, she might have multiple copies by now. hopefully she loses interest in trying to make me miserable soon, because so far i refuse to give her the satisfaction of any response at all.

the ex had one more trick up his sleeve that got revealed during the past week. he tried to tell his landlady that he'd moved out of the house and that i was going to be staying there, so that he could stick me with the bill that's sure to come for the damages he's incurred during the past few years! he and i had signed a joint lease for the place 10 years ago that was effective for one year, then automatically renewed on a monthly basis after that with the payment of the rent. i had told him to remove my name from the lease back in 2005 when i moved out the first time, but he didn't. when he invited me back to stay last summer, he had to clear it with the landlady to be sure she was OK with my dog being there again.

so last week i got a call from the landlady telling me that the ex had sent her a certified letter saying that he had moved out and was done with the house. i told her how he had taken some things out when the constable brought him there, but that all his furniture and most of his belongings were still there. i also let her know that i wasn't her tenant anymore, since the rent that renews the lease has only come from the ex for the past 2 years, and that i was supposed to have been removed from the lease. so today she called me again to say that she went to the house and saw how much stuff was still there, and to confirm that all of it is the ex's. so now i need to write up a letter to send to her via certified return receipt mail along with the key, to be sure that everything we said on the phone is written down for the record.

i can't believe that asshole ex of mine tried that! i hope the landlady screws his ass to the wall for damages. and i reeeally hope that this is the END of the fuckin drama. i hate this shit. flip, i will definitely PM you about the friendly legal advice! i just might still need it before i can consider myself done with this mess! and curio... i WILL take your advice, and get back to you soon! thank you all so much.... i love you all like a fat kid loves cake! :D

Duckfeet
08-12-2007, 07:16 PM
People fall so out of love, it's hard to believe, sometimes. I mean, I see Robin Wright Penn's smile, and I think, man, I sure miss my ex, who also could smile and melt my cold heart. We loved each other all up and down this country, fighting and getting back together from South Dakota to way down in Mexico. Once she hitchhiked from Louisiana up to Sturgis, and found me in the middle of a bunch of Harleys, and all these bikers thought, man who's this lovely chick chasing down...and then one day it was gone gone gone...

Just like this one is. But I'm sure that one time his every word was music to you...sad, really.

tptptp
08-12-2007, 07:29 PM
If you run a risk of having the records used against you in any way one word:

LAWYER

make that two words:

GOOD LAYWER

good lawyers are worth their weight in gold. I'd definitely take flip up on the offer